Warpaint
by Hidden Joy
Summary: "What's this?" "Warpaint." Jude and Connor are in love. But not everyone can except it. And sadly, Connor's father is one of those people. Connor makes the decision to move to LA with his mother, but he changes his mind after a tragedy strikes and Jude is left in a coma. Rated T for language and mentions of adult topics.
1. Prologue: The Accident

**_Prologue_** _ **: The Accident**_

 **Connor**  
 _Hey Jude  
Jude  
Jude  
Jude  
Judicorn  
Jude-y baby  
ANSWER MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE_

 **Jude**  
 _Oh my god what do U want from me?_

 **Connor**  
 _Ur heart_

 **Jude**  
 _Oh right I forgot, U R cheesy  
But reall blowing up my phone?_

 **Connor  
** _Cause I miss U  
_ _And I want U 2 come_ over

 **Jude**  
 _U could have just said that  
Lemme ask my_ _Moms_

 **Connor  
** _Ok_

Jude rolled his eyes and stood up from his bed, jogging down the stairs, holding his phone tightly in his hand. "Mom?" he asked, seeing Stef working in the kitchen. Stef looked up from her papers and smiled at her youngest child.

"Hey, love, whatcha need?" she asked, pulling her glasses off her eyes to focus on Jude.

"Nothing, really. I was just wondering if I could go to Connor's," Jude explained. A smile came onto his lips as he thought of his boyfriend. He and Connor had been hanging out quite a lot the past few weeks, and that was mainly due to the fact that Connor was leaving for LA soon. Really soon. Like, tomorrow soon.

"Why don't you just move there, huh? You've been spending so much time over there anyway," Stef teased, smirking at him.

"Are you mad?" Jude asked, tilting his head a bit.

"No, hun, I'm not mad. Momma and I just wish you would spend more time here, is all," Stef explained.

Jude closed his eyes. "Well, I'll be spending all my time here, starting tomorrow, so you don't have to worry about that," Jude explained, opening his eyes and letting out a deep breath. He was having trouble accepting the fact that Connor was leaving. Connor and him had been best friends for a little over a year, and boyfriends for about a third of that. Jude knew he was only thirteen, but he knew he loved Connor. And he was going to lose him, only three weeks after admitting that. But, he knew Connor needed to go. Connor's father didn't fully support him, and Connor deserved to be happy and safe.

Stef breathed a sigh, pinching the brim of her nose, then looking at her son. "Alright. Go ask Momma to drive you. I have work to do," Stef explained. She knew her son was struggling, but she didn't know how much.

"Thank you, Mom!" Jude exclaimed, moving forward and kissing his mother's cheek. "I love you," he told her.

"I love you, too!" she called, placing her glasses on her face as Jude made his way into the entrance hall. Jude texted Connor before heading back up the stairs to find Lena.

 **Jude**  
 _I'll be there in 15 mins_

"Momma?" Jude asked, knocking against the door frame to see Lena folding clothes on her and Stef's bed. Lena looked up, smiling at her son.

"Hey, bud!" Lena greeted, throwing down a shirt onto one of the piles and turning toward her son. "Something wrong?" she asked.

"No. Uh, I was wondering if you could drive me to Connor's?" Jude asked. She looked up hesitantly, but Jude spoke over her. "Please. It's his last day before he leaves," he explained, looking at Lena with pleading eyes.

"Alright, I'll be there in a second, okay?" Lena gave in. The thirteen year old nodded and turned around to exit the room and headed back down the stairs.

"Hey, Jude," Callie greeted from the living room, smiling at her younger brother. "Going to Connor's again?" she questioned, raising her eyebrows at him.

"Maybe," he joked, smiling at her. She tilted her head, giving him a look that said 'really?'. "Okay, yes," Jude explained, smiling at Callie.

"You're gonna be back for dinner, right?" she asked.

"Don't know," Jude admitted. He felt his phone buzz and glanced at the text.

 **Connor**  
 _I'll be waiting_

Jude smiled, then looked up as his sister spoke. "Well, hopefully you are. Mari and I are helping Momma cook tonight," she explained grinning at her brother.

"And on that note, I'll make sure to stay there for dinner," Jude teased. Callie threw him a playful glare before turning to her textbook.

"Whatever, have fun," Callie told him. She then looked up at him, smirking. "But, not too much," she winked, turning back to her book. Jude blushed, looking down and turning away from his sister. Three weeks ago, Adam had told Lena of the ordeal between Jude and Connor that had ended in Jude mortified as Lena showed him how to put on a condom. Mariana had overheard Adam telling Lena and spread it to the rest of the Adams Foster sibling. And the teasing still hadn't ceased.

"Ready, bud?" Lena asked as she came down the stairs. Jude nodded. He looked into the living room and called a bye to Callie and to Stef in the kitchen as the two went out to the car. Jude couldn't stop his thoughts from whirling as they drove to Connor's. How was he going to survive without his boyfriend?

As they reached Connor's house Jude quickly said goodbye to Lena and jogged to the porch where Connor was sitting on the steps. Connor quickly got to his feet, grinning as Jude reached him. He pulled Jude into him, wrapping his arms around Jude's waist. Jude let out a small laugh and gripped Connor sightly, burying his head against his boyfriend's shoulder. It had become a habit to hug each other when they first see each other, and when they part. Jude pulled back from Connor, but he couldn't go far before Connor's hand was wrapped in his.

"Hey," Jude finally breathed, smiling at Connor.

"Hey," Connor answered. He squeezed Jude's hand then turned toward the porch and led his boyfriend inside.

The two made their way upstairs to Connor's room, shutting the door behind them.

"How's your dad doing about this?" Jude asked, sitting with his legs crossed, facing Connor. Connor did the same, holding Jude's hand in his. Their knees were pressed against each other as talked. Connor shrugged, looking up from their hands to Jude's eyes.

"He keeps asking me to stay. But, you know... after what happened... he'll never accept us, Jude. He'll... never accept me," Connor explained, pain evident in his voice. Jude knew how much it hurt Connor that his father wasn't supportive of his sexuality. That's why he was moving to LA to be with his mother in the first place.

Jude nodded and leaned forward, pecking Connor's lips. "I love you, okay?" Jude told him, looking at Connor intently. Connor nodded, smiling at the words.

"I love you, too," he answered.

"What... what exactly happened, though? After he dropped me off, I mean," Jude questioned. Connor had only given him a vague description. But, Jude wanted to know everything. He didn't like that Adam had hurt Connor and that he couldn't know what had happened. Connor focused his eyes on their hands, running his thumb over Jude's hand. He breathed a sigh, then looked up at Jude and explained what happened.

[][][][][][][]

 _Connor pulled back from Jude, his breath heavy as he turned toward his father, who now stood in the doorway. Connor's eyes widened in shock and he quickly removed his hands from Jude's waist, feeling Jude's hands leave his neck._

 _"Oh my god," Connor mumbled, grabbing his shirt from the floor. Adam stood in the doorway, his face stern. The man coughed awkwardly, then looked to Jude who was scrabbling to pull his shirt over his head, his face turning bright red._

 _"You know, Jude I think it's time I take you home," Adam told the boy who just nodded, and grabbed his backpack. Connor watched Jude as he glanced back at Connor and then swiftly left Connor's room. Connor bit his lip, looking up at his father, who just shook his head._

 _"We'll talk when I get back," Adam decided, then closed Connor's bedroom door behind him. Connor took a breath, shifting his eyes around the room. He pulled his shirt back over his head and ran his fingers through his hair. It didn't feel nearly as nice as when Jude had done it a few moments ago. Despite the fear of what he would face when his father got home, a grin spread across his lips as he brushed his fingers against them. Had he really just made out with Jude Adams Foster? He leaned back against his pillow, grinning. He was so happy to finally have Jude. To be able to hug or kiss him whenever he wanted. God, he loved Jude._

 _Connor's eyes widened and his sat up right instantly. Love? He_ loved _Jude? He had always known he felt strongly for Jude, but now he put a name on it. Love. He loved Jude. "I love Jude," he whispered, grinning as he said it. Before he could dwell on it, he heard the front door open._

 _"Connor!" he heard his father's voice. The smile was wiped off his face as he heard the angry edge to his father's voice. As much as enjoyed his make out session with Jude, he didn't like the fact they had been caught._

 _He took a deep breath, then lifted himself from his bed and made his way down the stairs, meeting his father in the living room. His father stood beside the bed, his arms crossed over his face a mix of anger, confusion, and what seemed like fear._

 _"Before you say anything, Jude and I weren't planning on going any further," Connor quickly explained. He had received the sex talk when he and Daria were dating, and he was not prepared to have a different one. He saw slight relief come on his father's face. But it was replaced quickly with worry._

 _"Are you and Jude having sex? At all?" Adam asked._

 _"Oh, god, no!" Connor answered immediately, shaking his head vigorously. He knew that neither him or Jude was ready for that. Sure, the making out and removal of shirts was nice, but he didn't plan to go any further. His father nodded, still seeming not to believe it. "Dad, we aren't. We were just... fooling around, I guess," he explained, biting his lip and looking at his father._

 _"Fooling around? Connor, you can't just fool around whenever you want! You're thirteen!" Adam shouted. Connor took a step back. He was shocked at his father's outburst._

 _"Why are you getting so mad?" he questioned. "You didn't get this mad when you found Daria and I kissing. You we-" Connor stopped, his heart dropping as he realized what this was. "It's because he's a boy, isn't it? That's what this is about? It's because... I'm gay. That's why you're so mad," Connor spoke his thoughts out loud. He felt like he was suffocating. Was his father still against him being gay? He watched his father's face, hoping that even more anger, offense, or anything other than what he saw would appear. But, instead, he watched guilt wash across Adam's face._

 _"Connor, it's no-"_

 _"No! I can't believe this! You still can't accept that I'm gay! That I love Jude!" Connor cut Adam off, anger flaring in his eyes. The words slipped from his mouth easily as if he'd said them a hundred times. He watched his father's eyes widen._

 _"You_ love _him?" Adam asked._

 _Connor hesitated, then looked at Adam with confidence. "Yes. I do. I just... haven't told him yet," Connor explained, looking away._

 _"You don't love him," Adam decided._

 _Connor looked up. How could his father say that? Anger built inside him again. "Who are you to say that? You don't know how I feel! I do! Dad, he makes me happy. He makes me feel better when I'm sad. I love him. And if you can't accept it, just because I'm a boy and he is too... then... then..." Connor paused, looking away from his father as he thought._

 _"Then what, Connor?" his father asked, his eyes narrowed._

 _"Then maybe I should go live with Mom."_

[][][][][][][]

By the end of the story, the two boys were sitting side by side, Connor with his head on Jude's shoulder and Jude with his arm around Connor's. "I'm sorry," Jude whispered, kissing the top on Connor's head.

"It's not your fault. It's his. He can't accept me. That's on him," Connor explained, burying his head against Jude's neck. Jude ran his hand up and down Connor's arm.

"What am I gonna do without you?" Jude mumbled. Connor laughed a bit. He sat up, turning his eyes on Jude.

"I don't know what _I'm_ gonna do without _you_ ," Connor explained, smiling at Jude. Jude grinned back.

"We'll figure it out. There are trains, right?" Jude brought up. Connor laughed, shaking his head.

"God, I love you," Connor told Jude.

"You said that," Jude giggled, scrunching his face in his smile.

"I don't get tired of it," Connor admitted.

"Good. Because I love you, too," Jude agreed. He leaned forward and pressed his lips to Connor's, smiling against his boyfriend.

[][][][][][][]

"Call me as soon as you wake up, okay?" Jude mumbled, gripping his boyfriend tightly and closing his eyes.

"Okay," Connor whispered. He held onto Jude for dear life, not wanting to let him go. Ever. "And, you'll come visit me?" Connor questioned against Jude's shoulder.

"Yes. I love you, Connor," Jude told him, leaning back and look at Connor.

"I love you, too, Jude," Connor spoke, then leaned forward and kissed Jude's lips softly. "I'm gonna miss you so much," he told Jude once they pulled away.

"I'll miss you, too. Talk to you tomorrow?" Jude asked, moving back and tightening his grip on Connor's hand.

"Of course. Bye, Jude," Connor dismissed Jude, pecking Jude's lips again and releasing his hand and watching Jude walked down the porch steps.

"Bye, Connor," Jude told Connor, getting a good last look at Connor before he walked to the car where Stef sat waiting. Jude got into the car, taking a shaky breath and trying to hold back the tears he could feel coming. He looked out the window, watching Connor on the porch as Stef drove the car away. Jude turned his head forward, feeling Stef's hand on his knee.

"It's gonna be okay, love," Stef told her son, glancing at him, then focusing on the road.

"What if he finds someone better, in LA?" Jude squeaked out, closing his eyes as more tears flowed down his cheeks. He had been thinking of that a lot and was finally voicing his fears.

"Oh, sweetie, no, no, there's no one better than you!" Stef spoke confidently, turning the car.

"To you... but what if there's someone he lov-" Jude paused, quickly changing the word. Stef didn't know the two loved each other. "likes more?" But, the mistake hadn't gone unnoticed.

"Love?" she asked, smiling and looking over at Jude. Jude sighed and nodded.

"Yeah, I told him I love him and he said it back," Jude explained.

"When was this?" she asked.

"Callie's adoption," Jude admitted, glancing away from her. Stef nodded.

"And you really think he's gonna find someone else, when he loves you?" Stef pointed out, raising her eyebrows.

"I mean..." Jude sighed, running a hand through his hair and letting out a small sob. "LA is just so far away," Jude told her, resting his head against the window. Stef squeezed his knee.

"Do you think you could find someone better than Connor?"

"No!" Jude answered immediately. No one would ever be better than Connor.

"That's how he feels," Stef explained. Jude nodded, not completely believing it casting his gaze out the window. He breathed a sigh. The next few minutes were silent. Jude took a deep breath, then opened his eyes and looked out the window. His eyes widened, and he sat up, watching a car speed toward his side of the car as they drove through and intersection.

"Mom!" Jude yelled, moving closer to his mother. Stef looked over, confused, but her eyes widened as she saw what Jude was looking at. The car raced toward their's and then crashed into them.

* * *

 **Alright! So, that was the first chapter! I hope you guys liked it. I was going to take a different take on this, but after last night's episode I decided to take it this way because it will be so much better like this. This is set three weeks after the finale. Speaking of JONNOR I LOVE YOU'S AH!**

 **I hope to update this every Monday from now on. I know it will never replace the show, but I can do my best.**

 **Okay, here's a sneak peak for next week's chapter:**

"Jude? What about Jude?" Connor asked into the phone, his voice frantic. At this point all his tiredness was pushed to the back of his mind as thoughts raced through his head. Was Jude okay? What had happened?

"He... he and Stef... they got into a car accident," Lena spoke. Connor froze, even his heart beat seemed to stop.

"What? Wha- are they okay?" Connor asked. Silence. "Mrs. Adams Foster, are they okay?!"

 **Okay! I'm going to try to post the next chapter to Bring Me Home today too. Also, I'm working on writing a one-shot for the make-out scene we didn't see ;). Alright!**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own The Fosters or anything you recognize.**

 **-HJ**


	2. Day 1: Not Now

_**Day 1: Not Now**_

 _Rinnnnnnnnnnnnnng. Rinnnnnnnnnnnnnng. Rinnnnnnnnnnnnnng._

Connor groaned and sat up, rubbing his eyes. _Who the hell is calling me at..._ he looked at his alarm clock _one am?_ He finished his thought, letting out a yawn. He grabbed his phone off the bedside table and he nearly dropped it as he read the caller ID.

 _Mrs. Adams Foster (Lena)_ was displayed across the screen. Why was she calling? Sure, he had both of Jude's moms numbers and they had his, but it was only if he needed to talk or in case of an emergency. That thought, and the time of night it was caused Connor to frantically swipe the answer button across the screen and press the phone to his ear.

"Hello?" Connor asked. His voice hadn't given up the edge of sleep, but it was as frantic as he could be. He heard sniffling and muffled gasps on the other end, only making him more nervous. His heart sped up and his eyes widened in concern and fear. His breath came out shallow. "Mrs. Adams Foster?" Connor whispered as calmly as possible.

"Um, Connor," Lena said from the other end. He felt like his stomach was in his throat as he heard her voice. She was clearly crying, and fear laced her tone. "Something's... something's happened," she divulged, taking a deep breath after speaking. "With Jude," she finally finished.

"Jude? What about Jude?" Connor asked into the phone, his voice frantic. At this point all his tiredness was pushed to the back of his mind as thoughts raced through his head. Was Jude okay? What had happened?

"He... he and Stef... they got into a car accident," Lena spoke. Connor froze, even his heart beat seemed to stop.

"What? Wha- are they okay?" Connor asked. Silence. "Mrs. Adams Foster, are they okay?!" Connor pleaded, feeling like he was going to faint. A car accident. Connor remembered the last time a car accident had occurred in their family. Jesus and Mariana had almost been killed. What happened this time? He threw his legs over the side of his bed, resting his elbows on his knees and running his hand through his hair, a nervous habit.

"Stef, Stef is fine. She got out with scratches and bruises, but nothing too serious. But, Jude, he, uh," Lena paused, her voice becoming quiet. Connor's heart sank, and he felt like he was choking. "He was on the side the car got hit, and," Lena stopped again.

Connor took a shaky breath, holding back tears. "Please don't tell me he's... dead," Connor whispered, taking another breath. That word could not be fit with Jude. Jude didn't deserve it.

"No, no, he's not," Lena assured, her voice still shaky. "But, uh, he's in critical condition. I know it's late, but I know you'd want to know, s-" Connor cut her off.

"What hospital?" he asked, standing up and jogging toward the closet.

"Connor, I don't th-"

"Lena. Please," Connor pleaded, using her name. She always asked him to call her by her name, but he always refused. Though, he couldn't be formal at this point, in his haste.

He heard Lena sigh on the other end, then she spoke. "Sacred Cross. But I don't think you sh-" Connor cut her off again.

"Okay, thank you, I'll be there soon," He hung up, throwing his phone in his pajama pants pocket and grabbed his jacket and helmet from the closet. He threw on his jacket and put his helmet on his head. He paused when he went toward the door. Should he leave a note? He should leave a note. He frantically ripped a piece of paper out of a spare notebook and jotted down an explanation for when his father woke up and found him missing.

 _Jude in car accident._  
 _Went to Sacred Cross._  
 _Tell Mom not to come._  
 _-Connor_

It was a split decision, but he couldn't go to LA. Not now. Connor dropped his pen and placed the note on his bed and then raced out of his bedroom, down the stairs and through the garage. He got on his bike, then opened the garage door and sped out onto the street, taking the route to the hospital Jude was in. It was only a few blocks.

 _Critical condition._ The words played over and over again in Connor's head like a broken record. Jude was in critical condition. Connor's breath was heavy and his heart was racing. He felt like he was suffocating. The world rushed around him as he turned the corner, not caring who he passed in his haste. _His_ world was collapsing. He jumped off his bike as he reached the parking lot and locked his bike chain to the rack. He threw his helmet onto the handle, then turned on his heel and bolted into the ER. He turned his eyes around the room, not caring about the stares he was receiving. He rushed up to the front desk. The woman stared at him as if he had two heads as he rushed forward.

"I need to see Jude Adams Foster," Connor breathed, trying to calm himself.

The woman raised her eyebrows at him, her shocked expression leaving her face. "He's in surgery," she stated simply. Connor's heart fell.

"Wh-what? He's," Connor paused, then just nodded, stepping back, lifting his hand to his mouth. He took a few slow breaths. Surgery was good. They could fix him in surgery.

"Connor!" the boy looked over as he saw Lena jogging toward him. Connor met her halfway.

"Is he okay?" Connor whispered. Lena didn't answer, but pulled Connor against her in a hug. Connor took a deep breath, controlling himself. He couldn't cry. Not now. He hugged Lena back before she pulled away from him. He posed the question again. "Is he okay?"

Lena sighed, then looked at Connor. "He's, he's in surgery. They're working on him. They said they're doing everything they can," Connor could tell she was holding back her own tears and fear. Connor nodded, not trusting his voice. "Come on, everyone's in the waiting room," she told him, placing her arm around his shoulders and leading him toward the waiting room. Connor entered the small, comfortable waiting room. He could tell that whoever designed it had tried to make it feel homey and safe. But, with the thought of Jude's possible death running through his head, Connor could not feel safe.

His eyes rested on the Adams Foster family sitting in the chairs. Callie sat closest to the door leading to the ICU and surgery rooms. Her legs were pulled onto the chair with her, pressed to her chest, her face buried in her knees. She looked small. Stef sat beside her, covered in scars and bruising, but looking okay. The woman sat with her arm around Brandon, who was rested against her shoulder, silent, but making whimpering noises every now and then. Jesus sat a few seats down, looking at nothing in particular, seeming to be lost in his own thoughts. And Mariana stood at the end of the row of chairs, her head buried in her sweatshirt sleeves that overlapped her hands. Everyone looked up as Lena and Connor made their way over.

"Oh, Connor," Stef whispered, looking at him with concern. But she didn't move from holding onto Brandon, who just gripped her tighter at the sight of Connor. Connor figured he didn't look his best. Hair a mess from sleep and his helmet, bags around his eyes as well as them shinning with tears. He jacket thrown carelessly over his Star Wars night shirt, baggy pajama pants with designed with action figures, and shoes that weren't tied.

Callie looked over at him, covering her mouth, but turning away. Jesus sat up, shaking his head and sighing. Mariana, on the other hand, moved from her spot and wrapped her arms tightly around Connor. Connor hugged her back just as tightly, taken aback. It wasn't as if this was unusual for him, he had been like a part of the Adams Foster family for as long as he had known Jude. He thought of Stef and Lena like second and third moms and he felt as if the Adams Foster kids were his siblings and he knew they felt the same. Mariana had given him plenty of hugs before, being extremely affectionate as she was, but this was different. She was crying into his shoulder and hugging him as if squeezing him would make Jude all better.

The reality of the situation hit Connor again as he sighed and rested his head on Mariana's shoulder, hugging her back. He watched as Lena moved around the two and sat beside Jesus, watching them. After a few moments Connor and Mariana pulled away from each other. Mariana sniffed, rubbing her eyes with her sweatshirt sleeves and giving Connor a sad smile. Connor returned it, running his hand down her arm, then he watched her move to sit down on the other side of Jesus. Connor turned his eyes toward Stef.

"So... so what happened? You guys just left my house at nine," Connor choked out, closing his eyes as he heard his own voice crack.

"Uh, we were on our way home, when we turned onto an intersection and a car came racing toward us. It hit Jude's side of the car an-" Stef was cut off.

"It's your fault," Connor looked over at Callie, eyes wide as he heard her speak for the first time. She looked up, her legs falling from the chair onto the ground as she looked at Connor, shooting daggers. Her voice had been horse and filled with sadness, but anger stood out.

"I- what?" he asked, stepping back as she stood up.

"Callie, you know that's not true," Stef spoke, her voice sounding disappointed.

"Yes, it is!" Callie snapped, shooting her glare toward Stef. She then walked toward Connor, the glare still on her face. "If he hadn't stayed that extra hour at your house this wouldn't be happening! If you weren't going to LA and leaving him behind he wouldn't have had to be there at all! It's all your fault!" Callie screamed, shoving Connor as she reached him. Connor stumbled backward, landing in a chair behind him. He looked at Callie, slightly fearful. She was angry and upset, he could tell. He knew she didn't mean what she said. But, he still felt guilt well inside him. It was true. If he hadn't been moving to LA, then Jude wouldn't have been at his house. If he hadn't tried to keep Jude around longer, this wouldn't have happened.

"Callie!" Mariana shouted suddenly, grabbing her sister and pulling her back. "You know that's not true! Connor is moving to LA because he can't feel safe at home, he doesn't want to leave Jude. And if it was you in Jude's position, you would have wanted to stay that extra hour, too. This is nowhere near Connor's fault, this is that drunk idiot's fault! He rammed into the side of Mom's car, he hit them, he hurt Jude! Honestly, he got what he deserved!" Mariana shouted at Callie, who's face seemed to fall. Callie nodded, then looked at Connor who was still bewildered, then muttered an apology. She turned back toward her seat and pulled her legs back onto the chair.

"Mariana, no one ever deserves to die," Lena corrected her, standing up.

"He did more than Jude does," Mariana countered. Lena opened her mouth to speak, but then sighed, taking a seat beside Brandon now. Connor was still reeling from all that had just happened. He tried to collect his thoughts. Jude and Stef had apparently been on their way home from Connor's house when they got hit. The driver was drunk and had ended up dead in the incident. Stef was fine because the car had hit Jude's side and his body had taken most of the damage. He still had one thing from Mariana to correct.

"Was," Connor corrected, looking up.

"Was what?" Mariana asked, looking over at him.

"I _was_ moving to LA. I'm not now. Definitely not after this," he explained, standing up. He saw the entire Adams Foster family look at him shocked. Even Brandon turned his eyes from Stef's shoulder.

"What? Why not?" Jesus asked, tilting his head.

"Yeah, I thought your dad didn't accept you," Brandon added.

"He doesn't. But I can't leave. Not now, at least. Not after what happened. I can't leave Jude," Connor explained, looking at each of them.

"Does your dad know?" Stef asked, looking at Connor with raised eyebrows.

"He will when he wakes up. I left a note," Connor explained, casting his eyes downward. Connor heard footsteps, and he looked up as he felt arms wrap around his shoulders.

"I'm so sorry. I know you love him," Callie whispered, resting her head gently on his shoulder. Connor took a deep breath and wrapped his arms around Callie's waist. He felt tears slip from his eyes and he tried to compose himself. "It's okay to cry," Callie whispered, only for him to hear. Connor gripped her tighter. And it was then, in the arms of his boyfriend's sister, did Connor allow himself to break down.

[][][][][][][]

It was a few hours later, around five am, when the doctor came out. Everyone was silent, sitting in their chairs, trying to comfort one another. Connor sat as close as he could to the door, beside Brandon who had given up on earning help from his mother. Connor sat, his legs crossed on the chair, eyes cast downward. He had stopped crying only a few minutes after his initial breakdown with Callie, but the family still tried to get him to talk to them and take their comfort. He refused, keeping his focus down and his voice silent.

"Mrs. Adams Foster?" the doctor asked. Connor's head bolted up, and he stood, followed by Stef and Lena and the rest of the Adams Foster family. Stef and Lena stepped forward while the kids stayed back. Connor moved to step forward, but Brandon put his hand on the boy's shoulder and shook his head.

"That's me, well, both of us, but-" Stef stuttered, cut off by Lena.

"How's Jude?" Lena questioned.

"He's just gotten out of surgery and he's doing fine. There was some internal bleeding, he has a broken leg and plenty of scars and bruises. We removed all the glass and metal from him. We're hoping for a recovery, but..." the doctor paused. But? There was a but? What happened? Connor shoved Brandon's hand off his shoulder and moved forward, standing beside Stef as the doctor started talking again. "He's in a coma."

"A coma? Like a medical induced coma?" Stef questioned, hoping the doctors had put him under it so they could work on him.

"No. He is in a persistent vegetative state. We believe he hit his head in the accident which caused damage and forced his body to shut down. There is a seventy five percent chance that he will wake up and we don't know when. If he does there is a guarantee he will have some sort of brain trauma or damage. Amnesia, memory loss, dysfunction, we just don't know," the doctor explained. Connor felt his heart stop. Jude might not be okay. He might not live.

"Oh my god," Lena spoke covering her mouth. Connor glanced behind him as he heard retreating footsteps, and watched Callie leave, followed by Mariana. Brandon sat down in his chair, covering his face with his hands. Jesus moved forward, standing beside Lena.

"You can do something can't you?" Jesus asked, eyes narrowing at the doctor.

"I'm afraid that for now, all we can do is keep him alive and breathing. We finished his surgery and beyond that, we can't do anything to make him wake up," the doctor explain.

"I don't believe that bullshit for a second!" Jesus shouted.

"Jesus!" Lena warned, placing her hand on her son's shoulder.

"No, Momma. They're doctors, they're suppose to fix him! He has to wake up, he has to be alive!" Jesus shouted, shaking his head then turning around and leaving. Brandon quickly followed, saying he'd talk to him.

The doctor shook her head and looked at her remaining audience. Stef, Lena and Connor. "He's in the ICU, so you can see him, but immediate family only," Connor took a breath, holding back his tears as the last words hit him. He couldn't even _see_ Jude. He closed his eyes, but opened them again when he felt Stef's arm around him.

"It's okay, bud. You can see him soon," she told him, kissing his temple. Connor nodded, still unsure. He was angry. Angry that he couldn't see Jude. Angry at the dumbass driver that had hit him. Angry at his father for being unable to accept him. Angry at the world. Angry at himself. But, he kept quiet and just nodded at Stef as she dropped her arms from him and grabbing Lena's hand. "When the kids come back, you'll tell them where we are?" Stef asked. Connor just nodded, then watched as the two women followed the doctor into the hall. Connor sat down and stared at nothing.

He couldn't believe this. Jude might die. Connor tried not to think about that, but he knew it was true. There was no guarantee of Jude's survival. He might end up loosing Jude after everything he had gone threw to fight for him. The memory of the last time Connor had been in this hospital was still fresh in his brain. How could it not be? It was when his fighting had paid off. When he finally got Jude.

[][][][][][][]

 _Connor stared at the TV blankly, feeling no need to engage himself in the show. What was the point? His dad was taking everything he cared about away. Just because he couldn't accept that his son was gay._

 _It had taken a lot for Connor to finally admit his sexuality, and he was happy it had finally happened. He had finally admitted to himself, and his father, that he was gay. That he liked Jude. But, the problem was, his father didn't understand. He thought Jude had turned him gay. As if that was possible. Now, Connor wasn't allowed to see Jude, and he wasn't even allowed to have his phone. Connor was just glad that he had been able to explain to Jude what happened when Taylor had let him borrow her phone. But, that was his last chance. And he was miserable._

 _Connor looked over as he heard the door click open. His father walked in, looking at his son almost sympathetically. Connor decided he wasn't going to say anything. He was just going to let his father speak. But, Adam didn't say a word. After a moment, he stepped away from the door and in walked Jude. Connor couldn't help the smile that broke out on his face as he saw Jude. Jude shared a look with Adam, who nodded. Jude walked further into the room and Adam exited, shutting the door behind him. Connor sat up, the grin on his face growing as Jude came toward his bed._

 _Jude smiled back at Connor, his features alight. The boy glanced at Connor's foot, then back at Connor's face. Connor's eyes focused on Jude's hand and he smiled when he noticed the blue nail polish. He reached forward, taking one of Jude's hands in his and running his thumb over Jude's knuckles. He looked at the nail polish, then back at Jude._

 _"What's this?" he questioned, looking up at Jude._

 _Jude paused, then spoke, in that soft, sweet voice. "Warpaint." Connor grinned, giving Jude's hand a squeeze before letting it fall back against his other hand. He watched Jude look over at the TV. "What are you watching?" he asked._

 _"I honestly have no idea," Connor answered, moving over on the bed so Jude could lay with him. Jude smiled, settling next to Connor and focusing his eyes on the TV. "I wasn't really paying attention," Connor admitted, smiling as Jude rested his head against Connor's._

 _"Why's that?" Jude asked, looking at Connor, who looked back._

 _"Because I was thinking about you. And of how much of a jerk I've been, and that I would never get a chance to apologize because my dad wasn't going to let me see you," Connor explained. He met Jude's beautiful caramel brown eyes. A smile grazed Jude's lips._

 _"Well, now you can," Jude commented, moving impossibly closer to Connor. Connor nodded. He breathed a sigh, then sat up, looking at Jude, who lay still, watching Connor._

 _"I'm so sorry, Jude," Connor whispered, feeling tears well in his eyes. "I shouldn't have led you on. I should have just accepted that I like you and broken up with Daria. I shouldn't have even dated her in the first place!" Connor explained, throwing his hands up and shaking his head. He ran his hands through his hair. "I was such and idiot," Connor decided._

 _"Kinda," Jude agreed, sitting up, placing his hand on Connor's. "Did you break up with her?" Jude asked, playing with Connor's fingers. Connor felt a smile play on his lips at the action._

 _"Yeah, when she visited me," Connor told him. Jude nodded._

 _"So... what does that make us?" Jude asked, looking up at Connor expectantly. Connor took a breath._

 _"Well... I_ want _to be your boyfriend. But, I understand if you don't want to be mine, given everything that's happened. I know you f-"_

 _"Yes," Jude cut him off, grinning._

 _"Yes?" Connor questioned, tilting his head._

 _"Yes, I'll be your boyfriend," Jude explained. Connor's grin matched Jude's._

 _"Really?" he asked, leaning closer to Jude._

 _"Really," Jude answered. And, for the first time, Jude leaned in for it. Jude pressed a sweet, soft kiss to Connor's lips. It was longer than their last kiss, but shorter than their first. And it held more meaning than both. They pulled away, smiling at each other. Jude sat back against the bed, tugging Connor's hand as he did so and focused on the TV. They laid that way, watching TV, holding hands, and talking quietly as boyfriends until Jude had to go to Mariana's dance competition. Though it wasn't their most exciting time together, it was their favorite._

[][][][][][][]

Connor's eyes widened as he realized something. Jude might not remember that. If Jude wakes up, he might forget. Forget everything. Forget Connor. The boy was snapped from his thoughts as he heard someone sit heavily beside him. He looked over and saw Jesus sitting with his arms crossed and a glare fixed on his face.

"Where's our Moms?" Brandon asked as he sat on the other side of Connor.

"In the ICU. It was immediate family only, so I couldn't see him," Connor mumbled, looking away from both of the boys and casting his eyes downward. Brandon nodded, then gently placed his arm around Connor's shoulders and rubbed his arm.

"He'll be okay," Brandon tried to reassure him.

"You don't know that. They said there is only a seventy five percent chance of him waking up-"

"That's more than half, Connor. You have to look on the positive side," Brandon attempted.

"Okay, and what if he does wake up, huh? He might not remember us!" Connor countered. He felt Jesus flinch from the other side of him. Brandon sighed.

"But he might. That's the important part. He can wake up. You, of all people, should know how much of a fighter Jude is," Brandon told him, giving him a 'you know I'm right about this' look. Connor just sighed. He looked at Brandon tearfully.

"Brandon... I can't loose him," Connor explained, taking a breath and trying to calm himself. Brandon pulled Connor against his shoulder and placing his other hand on Connor's back.

"I know," Brandon mumbled. Connor let a few tears flow down his cheeks, choking back sobs. He didn't attempt to hug Brandon back. He could hear Mariana and Callie coming back and heard Brandon mumble about how their Moms were in the ICU. The two took seats beside their brothers and Connor in silence.

[][][][][][][]

Around eleven thirty was when Connor's phone went off. He pulled it out of his pocket, not bothering it check the ID and slid the answer button across the screen. He pressed it to his ear.

"Hello?" Connor asked, standing up and moving away from the Adams Foster family who just smiled stiffly at him.

"Connor? Where are you!" Connor heard his father's voice rumble through the phone. Connor closed his eyes.

"Did you read the note?" Connor asked.

"Note? What?" Adam mumbled. Connor heard shuffling and mumbling on the other end before Adam spoke again. "Car accident? Jude was in a car accident? And why did you leave without telling me? What do you mean to tell your mother not to come?" Adam questioned. Connor opened his eyes, trying to keep his anger from boiling over.

"Yes, Jude was in a car accident. Him and Stef were on their way home from our house when a drunk driver hit them. The driver died, Stef got out in okay condition, but Jude was hurt badly. I left without telling you because I knew you wouldn't let me come. I mean to tell Mom not to come because I'm not going to LA. Not after what happened. I need to stay near him, and I know you don't understand, but I love him, Dad. I'm not leaving," Connor rambled, determined. He glanced behind him and saw Stef and Lena smiling encouragingly at him. They were proud. Connor turned away from them again.

He heard his father sigh. "Yes, you are Connor. You promised your mother you would go and live with her and you are sticking to that promise," Adam decided firmly.

"No, Dad, I'm not! You're the only reason I wanted to leave in the first place! And you've been begging me for weeks to stay, but now that something's happened to Jude, you want me to go?" Connor burst, letting his anger take over.

"Connor-"

"No, I don't want to hear it! I'm sick of this, just don't bother calling me back. I'll stay at the hospital or with the Adams Fosters until Jude gets out," Connor hung up instantly, the last part much calmer than the rest. He put his phone in his pocket and turned back around to see the Adams Foster clan looking at him, shocked. "Sorry," Connor mumbled, sitting back in his seat. He knew he was going to be in big trouble, but he wasn't going to deal with his father's homophobic tendencies.

"Nice job, dude!" Connor glanced over as Jesus spoke and smiled softly.

"Jesus," Stef mumbled, but her tone was humorous as she spoke. Jesus shrugged, but turned toward Connor and raised his hand. Connor laughed and hit his hand against Jesus'. Connor then turned toward Stef and Lena.

"Is it okay if I-"

"Of course, honey. You're a part of the family," Lena assured, sharing a look with Stef who nodded. Connor felt a smile cross his face. The Adams Fosters were the closest thing to family he had. He had his mom, sure, but she had left for LA and never bothered to visit him much. He nodded and looked up as the doctor came in.

"You all can see him. Two at a time," Connor sighed as the doctor spoke. He knew the rest of the family would want to see him first.

Well, that was until Callie put a hand on his shoulder. "Can Connor and I go in first?" Callie asked, looking at her family. The five others nodded, with a slight resentment from Jesus. Connor stood up.

"Are you sure, Callie? Maybe Stef or Lena should go in fi-"

"No, Connor. We know you need to see him," Stef interrupted him. He seemed to be being interrupted a lot lately. He just nodded as the doctor led him and Callie to Jude's room. The doctor left the room when they entered.

Connor let out an audible gasp as he saw Jude. The boy was hooked up to, in Connor's estimate, a thousand different machines. His broken leg was elevated, and he had terrible scars an bruises all over him. His eyes were closed lightly, hiding his eyes from the world and his hair was a mangled mess. A blanket was thrown lightly over him and he was wearing an ugly hospital gown. Connor choked on another sob, then rushed forward. He sat in the seat beside Jude and picked up the broken boy's hand gently. It was still as warm as Jude had always been.

"Jude," Connor croaked, watching the boy's chest move up and down slowly. It was the only sign of life Connor could find, and he was holding onto it. Callie stood on the other side of the bed, tears flowing down her cheeks as she pressed her hand gently on Jude's arm. Connor stayed silent and kept his hand in Jude's. He refused to leave Jude's side for the rest of the day. Stef ended up staying with him through the night.

* * *

 **Okay, wow, this is the longest chapter I've _ever_ written. I hope you guys liked it. I plan to make this about the two weeks Jude is in the hospital, and if you read the original one-shot, this is clearly going to be very different. I've fledged it out quite a bit and have many plans for it! I'm not going to leave a teaser for this week. If you have questions or anything, you can ask me on Tumblr under the name jonnorlandfill. I really need to start giving that out more, but yeah! Love you guys, see you next week.**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own The Fosters or anything you recognize.**

 **-HJ**


	3. Day 2: DNA Doesn't Make a Family

_**Day 2: DNA Doesn't Make a Family**_

 _"You're hogging all the popcorn!" Connor laughed, pulling the bowl from Jude's grip. The two sat on the couch in the Adams Foster's living room, watching_ The Avengers _and goofing around._

 _Jude rolled his eyes and allowed his boyfriend to take the bowl from him. Connor grabbed a handful of popcorn and stuffed it into his mouth, attempting to fit it all. But, most of it ended up falling onto his chest and into Jude's hair. "Dork," Jude laughed, sitting up from where he was against Connor's chest to brush the popcorn from his hair._

 _"Shut up," Connor spoke through the mouthful. He had to keep himself from laughing as he chewed and swallowed to avoid choking._

 _"And now there's popcorn everywhere and Moms are gonna kill me," Jude commented, letting his last few laughs slip from his mouth as he shook his head. The popcorn that hadn't ended up in Connor's mouth now was scattered about the couch and floor._

 _"We'll clean it up later, babe," Connor mumbled, frowning at Jude who was still sitting up. Jude's face broke out in a grin and he let out a small giggle. "What?" Connor asked, furrowing his eyebrows._

 _"Babe?" Jude repeated, his smile growing at the word. It was a term neither of them had used before, but it seemed so natural coming out of Connor's mouth. Connor's cheeks heated up, and he focused his eyes on the popcorn bowl, picking up a few pieces and then dropping them back in the bowl._

 _"Well - I just - I," Connor stuttered, biting the inside of his cheek. He looked at Jude as he heard another giggle escape his boyfriend's mouth._

 _"Don't worry, Con, I like it," Jude grinned. Connor returned it, nodding, the dark color leaving his cheeks._

 _"Alright, well, come back over here and watch the movie. Babe," Connor added, smirking as Jude laughed again and nodded._

 _"Yes sir," Jude mumbled. He scooted back over and rested his head against Connor's chest. That was often how the two laid. Both slouched against the couch, Connor sitting with his legs crossed on it, his arm thrown across Jude's shoulders gently. Jude would have his legs scrunched beneath him, his knees touching Connor's, his head against Connor's chest. Sometimes he would hug the other boy's waist, but it was not the case this time, as Jude kept his hands free to grab the popcorn from the bowl._

 _"I'm gonna miss this," Connor whispered a few minutes later. He squeezed Jude's shoulder as he spoke, breathing a sigh. Jude frowned, moving his eyes down, then focusing his eyes on Connor's hand that hovered over the popcorn bowl._

 _"Me too," he mumbled back. Jude lifted his left hand onto his shoulder, interlocking his fingers gently with Connor's. Connor smiled at the action, leaning down and nuzzling his nose gently against Jude's hair._

 _"Why do I have to go to LA, again?" Connor whispered, closing his eyes and pressing a soft kiss to Jude's hair. He heard Jude sigh, then felt his boyfriend shift. Jude sat up, keeping his fingers locked with Connor's and turning his body toward Connor. He pulled Connor's arm from around his shoulders and placed it on his lap, playing with his boyfriend's fingers. He lifted his eyes to Connor, who refused to look at him._

 _"Connor. You don't feel safe and happy at home. You have to feel that way. And no matter how much I'm gonna miss you, I'm not letting you stay with your Dad if you don't feel like that," Jude stated determinedly. He used the hand that wasn't holding Connor's and lifted his boyfriend's chin. Connor sighed and took a deep breath, meeting his boyfriend's glistening brown eyes._

 _"Why can't he just accept me?" Connor whispered, his voice cracking. Jude took the popcorn bowl from Connor and moved it onto the coffee table, pulling the boy against him. Connor took a shaky breath, tears starting to flow down his cheeks as he wrapped his arms securely around Jude's waist._

 _"I don't know. But he's not your only family, Connor. You have your mom, you have my moms and my siblings, you have me. We all accept you. We all love you. If your dad can't do that then that's his loss," Jude assured Connor, moving his hand up and down Connor's back comfortingly. Connor nodded slowly._

 _"I don't know what I'd ever do without you, Jude," Connor choked, holding onto Jude tighter._

 _"You won't have to find out," Jude assured._

[][][][][][][]

"Connor!"

Connor blinked his eyes open, taking a minute to take in his surroundings. He was sitting in a chair beside Jude's hospital bed, still gripping the unconscious boy's hand. Connor closed his eyes briefly as the memory flashed through his mind like it had in his dream.

 _Now I might just have to._

Connor shook the thought away. He was _not_ going to lose Jude.

"Connor!" Stef's voice rang through his ears again. Connor lifted his head from the back of the chair, groaning. Maybe he hadn't been such a good idea to sleep in the chair. His entire body felt stiff.

"Sorry, sorry," Connor mumbled, squeezing Jude's hand before letting it fall against the bed. He stood up, rubbing his eyes and turning toward the woman.

"It's okay, love," Stef assured him, placing her hand on Connor's shoulder, giving him a sympathetic look. "But, uh, we gotta head home. Just for a little bit, you need to change and shower, and maybe get some proper sleep, alright?" Stef told him. Connor opened his mouth to protest, but closed it immediately when she gave him a stern look. He knew it was better not to argue with her. "He'll still be here when we get back, and Lena and Jesus are here, they'll call if anything happens," Stef explained further. Connor sighed, looking over at Jude, who lay blissfully unaware of his condition or the toll it was taking on his boyfriend. Connor knew Jude would want Connor to function until he woke up. Connor nodded, then looked back at Stef.

"Okay," he agreed.

"Okay? Okay, let's go," Stef smiled softly at him, wrapping her arm around his shoulders as she led him back out toward the waiting room. Once they reached the waiting room, Lena stood up from her chair and walked over to the two, Jesus following after.

"Hey, bud, how're you doing?" Lena asked, placing her own hand on Connor's shoulder. Connor sighed and focused on the ground and tugged the sleeves of his jacket over his hands, not trusting his voice. But, his actions had been enough. Lena pulled him by the shoulder gently, releasing him from Stef's grip and into her own. Connor settled against Lena, hugging her. Out of both of Jude's mothers, Connor shared a closer bond with Stef, as the two of them were so alike. But, in this moment he felt he needed comfort from Lena. The reason stuck out in his head and he closed his eyes and squeezed her tighter as it ran through his mind. _It's because he's just like her._

Connor listened to Jesus and Stef interact for a few moments before pulling away from Lena and standing beside Stef. The blonde woman placed her arm back around the boy's shoulders. "Alright, well, I'm gonna take Connor back home to get changed and sleep for a bit," Stef explained, squeezing Connor's shoulder.

"Okay, well, we'll call you if anything happens," Lena assured. Connor nodded.

"See you later, dude," Jesus mumbled, turning back to his seat.

"Later," Connor spoke for the first time since leaving Jude's room. Lena smiled at him, then sat back down beside her son. Stef led Connor back out to the car. The drive to the Adams Foster home was mostly silent until Connor spoke up.

"Wait, Mrs. Adams Foster, I don't have any clothes at your house," Connor pointed out.

"Call me Stef," she started firmly. Connor nodded. "And, you can... you can borrow something of Jude's, you guys are roughly the same size now. If not, you can wear something of Jesus', I'm sure he won't mind," Stef explained. Connor took a breath and just nodded. He was probably going to force himself into Jude's clothes. He felt as if Jude's presence still lingered on them. He needed to feel like Jude was with him if not for the few hours he was going to be in his boyfriend's room.

Stef pulled the car up to the driveway and parked it. The two made their way inside, and once they entered the house they were surrounded by Brandon, Mariana, and Callie.

"How'd you managed to pull him out of the room?" Brandon commented lightheartedly, trying to keep the mood hopeful. Mariana and Callie forced out small laughs while Stef just shook her head. Connor kept his eyes on the floor, not wanting to speak.

"We're gonna shower and rest up, you guys okay with going back to the hospital in a few hours?" Stef asked her three children in front of her.

"Of course."

"Yeah."

"Totally." Brandon, Callie and Mariana responded at once. The siblings separated, Callie heading to the kitchen, Brandon to the living room, and Mariana up the stairs.

"Okay, bud, why don't you head upstairs, grab some clothes, take a shower," Stef suggested. She looked at Connor who just nodded and then jogged up the familiar steps of the Adams Foster home. He paused as he came to Jude's and Jesus' bedroom door. He took a breath before turning the knob and pushing the door open.

One thing Connor prided himself in was his ability to remember every inch of the Adams Foster home as if it was his own. He knew where each game in the game closet was suppose to go. He knew where each book on the shelf fit. He knew which video games were in the wrong cases that they never bothered to switch or put back. He knew every nick and cranny of the home like he knew the back of his hand. (Actually, he probably knows the house better than the back of his hand. Being someone who enjoys a lot of physical activities, he'll find scratches he doesn't remember getting all over his body).

Jude's room should have been the easiest to navigate. He spent so much time up there. Working on projects, playing hand held games, talking and goofing off, sleeping over. But, when he entered the room he felt as if he was in new territory. The books were stacked the same. The clothes were thrown carelessly around the same. The sheets were the same. Everything was the same. But it was different. Because Jude wasn't there. Connor had only been in Jude's room by himself once or twice. Every other time he had been with Jude.

Even if they had been spending so much time at Connor's the past few weeks, due to his packing procrastination and his father's need for him to be there, it had only been a few days since Connor had been in this room. But, again, it felt _different._

In a quick decision, Connor decided on napping first, knowing his tiredness would fade if he showered first and then come back full force later. He gently shut the bedroom door and buried himself under Jude's covers, remembering his latest experience in this room.

[][][][][][][]

 _"I can't believe I actually have to go to school if I'm just going to be leaving in four days!" Connor commented as Jude and him reached the top of the stairs._

 _"It's so you have to be forced into having two first days of school!" Jude teased, entering his room and leaving the door slightly ajar behind Connor._

 _"Oh, the torture!" Connor laughed, shaking his head and throwing down his backpack and plopping into Jude's bean bag chair. "On the plus side, it's more time to spend with you before I go," Connor commented. Jude smiled softly, nodding and putting his backpack on his bed._

 _"Well, while you may be able to skip by on doing your homework with the excuse that it's not due until after you're in LA, I still have to do mine. So, try not to distract me, okay?" Jude told Connor, crossing his legs on the bed and shuffling through his bag. The last time Connor had distracted Jude during homework had ended in their shirts discarded from their bodies._

 _A playful smirk played on Connor's lips. "I have no idea what you're talking about," he played innocent. Jude rolled his eyes, shaking his head at his boyfriend._

 _"Glad it's so easy for you to forget we made out," Jude sassed, smirking at Connor who just narrowed his eyes and frowned._

 _But, the smirk soon returned. "Oh, how could I forget?" the boy flirted, pushing himself from the bean bag chair. He stalked over to the bed and sat beside Jude who had pulled out his math text book and was doing his best to ignore Connor's advances. Connor scooted closer to Jude, moving his arm behind Jude and leaning his weight on it. He placed his chin on Jude's shoulder and tilted it, pressing his lips softly to Jude's cheek. He felt his boyfriend shiver against the soft touch, but shake his head._

 _"Connor, please," Jude turned his head to face Connor, giving his boyfriend a serious look. But, Jude turning his head had been enough, and Connor swiftly connected their lips, smiling as he felt Jude groan in frustration. But, Jude gave in and pressed his lips against Connor's forcefully. Connor pulled back, resting his forehead against Jude's and grinning at him. Jude attempted to frown, but ended up giggling softly._

 _"I love youuuu," Connor whispered, leaning closer and pressing his lips to the corner of Jude's and pulling back._

 _"I love you, too," Jude mumbled, pushing Connor's shoulder. "Now, let me work," Jude informed. Connor sighed and nodded._

 _"Alright."_

[][][][][][][]

Connor woke up as the memory came to an end. He took a deep breath and curled himself against Jude's pillow. _Why did this happen to him?_ Jude was the last person that deserved to end up in a coma. To have the possibility of death or loosing their memory. Jude was the absolute last person that deserved it. Connor pressed his nose into the bed, taking in the scent. Connor always thought it was corny and dumb whenever he heard someone say that clothes or blankets smelled of someone. But the sheets and pillow _did_ smell like Jude. A combination of his cologne and mint. It felt like him, too. Warm and inviting. Comfortable and kind.

Connor sighed and forced himself out, knowing that the Adams Fosters would want to go soon. Besides, he wanted to see Jude as well. Connor collected some clothes from Jude's drawers and then knocked on the bathroom door, finding no one inside. He placed the clothes on the toilet to change into when he finished his shower. He turned on the water, wanting it to warm up before he got in. He stripped off the clothes he'd been wearing for over twenty four hours and put them in the hamper.

He showered for only a few minutes before drying off and changing into Jude's clean clothes. They were soft against his skin, but Connor liked it. He grabbed his jacket and threw it over his torso and jogged out of the bathroom and down the stairs. Connor paused as he reached the bottom of the stairs, hearing voices from the kitchen. He turned his way into the living room and stood silently near the door to the kitchen, listening as the voices spoke.

"He'll be okay."

"Yeah, sure, he might. But will Connor be okay if he's in this coma for another two days? A week? Two weeks?"

"I'm sure he'll be fine."

"Brandon, Callie's right, did you see him? He's a mess, and it's only been a day."

Connor frowned as he heard Mariana's voice cut between Brandon and Callie's conversation. They were right...

"I just, I don't know. There's nothing we can do, it's not like we're doctors. And it's not just about Connor, we're all suffering here, too," Brandon countered.

"Yeah, but it's worse on Connor. He's in love with Jude. Imagine if it was Lou. Or Mat," Callie commented.

"I guess you're right," Brandon mumbled.

Connor couldn't listen anymore. He turned into the kitchen, making his presence known. The three siblings turned their gazes to him, eyes wide.

"Uh, hey, hey Con," Callie created. He nodded to them, sitting down beside Brandon.

"What are you guys talking about?" Connor asked. He watched relief wash over their faces briefly before they all threw out excuses.

"Makeup."

"Baseball."

"Food." They all gave each other panicked looks.

"We... we were talking about the makeup this girl at the food stall at this baseball game was wearing," Mariana covered, looking at her brother and sister who nodded in agreement..

"Okay," Connor mumbled. Couldn't they have just told him? "So, uh, are we gonna be going back soon?" he questioned. He watched the siblings exchange glances. Connor rolled his eyes, throwing his hands up, throwing away his decision to let them get away with their conversation. "Yeah, I heard you!" Connor exclaimed, letting his arm fall against the table. He kept his eyes on it, scratching his nails against the wood. The siblings fell silent and then Connor felt Brandon's arm around his shoulder.

"Connor, we're just..."

"Worried about me, I know," Connor finished the boy's sentence, lifting his eyes and looking at Brandon. "And I appreciate that. But, I'm not the one we need to be worried about. I'll be fine, I can function, it's not like I'm refusing to do anything until he wakes up. Is it terrifying and am I freaking out? Hell yeah, but you don't need to worry about me," Connor explained, looking at each of the Adams Foster siblings.

He watched Callie breathe a sigh. "Connor, you know we only worry because we care," she informed.

Connor nodded. "I know. Trust me, I love that you guys care about me so much, especially with the whole thing with my dad. But, I know you guys are upset, too. You don't have to pull a strong front," Connor told them. He watched a smile spread across Mariana's face as she looked at him.

"You really are one special kid, huh?" Mariana asked. Connor gave her a half smile and shrugged against Brandon's arm.

"You know, you and Jude are so mature," Callie added, smiling at Connor. "I don't know why I doubted you."

"You doubted me?" Connor asked, feeling Brandon's arm leave his shoulders. Callie's mouth fell open.

"Uh, yeah," Callie muttered, looking down. Brandon and Mariana laughed.

"She told Jude not to hang out with you after you got shot," Brandon explained.

"Hey!" Connor shouted, slightly offended as Callie laughed, shaking her head.

"Well, he snuck out and drank! What was I suppose to think?" Callie reasoned. Connor rolled his eyes and shook his head. "Oh, whatever, the point is, I see that you and Jude are good together. You make him happy," Callie finished. Mariana and Brandon nodded in agreement. Connor smiled, looking down.

"Thanks," Connor muttered.

"Hey, what's going on in here!" Stef asked, entering the kitchen.

"Nothing," the four answered. Stef narrowed her eyes a bit, but just nodded.

"Alright. You all want to go back to the hospital with Momma and Jesus?" she questioned. The four of them agreed and filed out into the car. Brandon sat in the front with Stef, while Mariana, Callie and Connor all squeezed into the backseat. Connor allowed a genuine smile to appear on his face. _This_ was his family. And he was going to keep it that way.

* * *

 **It's a little short, but I liked where I ended it. I should probably inform you guys that there will be plenty of flashbacks throughout this, and POV (point of view) changes, so like while the past few chapters have focused mostly on Connor, but future ones can and will focus on the rest of the family. I can't promise all of the family's POVs will be featured, but there will be some :).**

 **Ask me questions and follow me on Tumblr at jonnorlandfill**

 **I don't own The Fosters or anything you may recognize.**

 **-HJ**


	4. Day 3: Not Surprising

_**Day 3: Not Surprising**_

 _"You want me to teach your how to skateboard?" Jesus questioned, furrowing his eyebrows at his younger brother._

 _"Well, yeah. You know how, Brandon knows how, Connor knows how. I figured why not? Besides I have that board you gave me months ago just lying around," Jude explained. He stepped back from Jesus, who stood up from his bed and moved toward his desk._

 _"Can't you have your boyfriend teach you?" Jesus questioned, shifting through some books on his desk._

 _"See, I would. But, you know exactly what's gonna happen if I ask Moms to let me and Connor go to a skate park alone," Jude spoke matter-of-factly. He rolled his eyes and crossed arms over his chest._

 _"Ah, yes, I do. You got yourself into that mess," Jesus muttered, turning to Jude and smirking. Jude's cheeks turned pink, but he rolled his eyes._

 _"It was one time!"_

 _"Comes at a prize, little bro!" Jesus answered, ruffling his hair. "Also, it was twice. You forget my first week back?"_

 _Jude glared at his brother. "Whatever. So, will you teach me or not?" Jude asked, dropping his arms from his chest._

 _Jesus paused, sitting at his desk and pondering for a second. "Alright."_

 _"Really?" Jude asked, perking up._

 _"Yeah, sure. Why not?" Jesus reasoned._

 _"Thank you so much, Jesus!" Jude grinned and jogged out of the room and down the stairs. Jesus rolled his eyes, shaking his head as he watched his brother go. How did he end up with such a dorky little brother?_

[][][][][][][]

Jesus lifted his eyes from his lap, bouncing his leg up and down. Fidgeting was always how he calmed himself, a side effect of his ADHD. But, it didn't seem to be helping. It hadn't for the past three days. His nerves and fear had just continued building. It wasn't like he was alone in that. His entire family was a wreck. But, Stef and Lena were trying to keep it together for their children's sake. Lena had even urged them to go to school that morning. But none of them were up for it. Connor especially had refused. Lena had gone only for a few hours before Monte had caught on to Lena's behavior and questioned her. Lena had explained the situation, adding that it was the reason six kids were missing from school. Monte had sent Lena home, telling her she couldn't do her job correctly while she was so worried.

But, their absent hadn't gone overlooked at school. Jesus himself had gotten at least twenty texts from friends who noticed his own absence, as well as Brandon, Callie, Mariana, and Lena's. Most of his friends didn't notice Jude or Connor's absence, since they were all in the high school part of Anchor Beach. Brandon, Callie and Mariana had earned the same. Jesus had given the excuse that a bug had gone through the house.

After an hour Jesus had turned his phone off, but he would watch Mariana furiously texting away, her eyes narrowed and her eyebrows furrowed. Her sister was obviously annoyed at whoever she was talking to. Callie had put her phone on airplane mode and set to editing a few photos. Brandon just silenced his phone and kept it in his pocket.

Nothing had happened since everyone had come back to the hospital yesterday. No news. No movement. No waking. But, as Stef kept reassuring them "no news is good news."

Jesus just thought that was dumb, and he voiced his thoughts as he usually did. He just earned a head shake and a sigh.

The teenager furrowed his eyebrows as he heard the ding of a cellphone beside him, coming from Connor. Connor, who had previously been in an uncomfortable looking position, (legs scrunched up on the chair, hugging them and leaning against the opposite arm rest), sat up and pulled his phone from his pocket. Jesus frowned as he noticed the younger boy's face completely lost of all emotion. He knew Connor was being torn apart with worry and fear. Jesus wasn't dumb, he knew Jude's state was affecting Connor the most. Anyone with eyes could tell how much his brother and the boy beside him cared for one another.

"Who is it?" Jesus questioned, watching Connor stare at an open message.

"Taylor." Connor answered, turning off the screen.

"Remind me who she is?" Jesus asked. The entire complication with the younger boys' lives had melted together in his mind.

"She's the friend that kind of brought Jude and I together... I guess?" Connor paused, shaking his head. "Taylor is Daria's friend, the girl I was dating as a cover up. And she kind of picked up on how Jude and I felt about each other and sort of pushed us together. That's how we ended up sneaking into her house and drinking and how I got shot in the foot. But, after we got together, she sort of outed us at school. It's messy, but she's still our friend," Connor explained, shrugging.

"Oh..." Jesus mumbled, still a bit confused about the situation. "What did she want?" Jesus asked.

"She wanted to know if Jude not being in school had something to do with me being in LA... I don't know how I can tell her what happened," Connor explained, shaking his head.

"Well, if she's your friend, she should know the truth, right?" Jesus asked, hoping to help the boy.

"I guess..." Connor mumbled, casting his eyes downward. "I'm gonna go call her," Connor explained, standing up and stepping out of the comfortable waiting room. Jesus took deep breath and shook his head. He was worried for Connor. Sure, he hadn't liked Connor very much at first. Especially when he had assumed the boy was hurting his younger brother. But, Connor had redeemed himself. Though, he wished he had found out about that in a much more pleasant way.

[][][][][][][]

 _Jude and Connor had been acting strange. Well, not strange, just... different. Jesus had been noticing all the tiny things that had led him to believe something might be going on between them a lot more since he got back. They sat closer than they should, but neither bothered to move away. Their lingering touches lasted longer than a few seconds. And if one of them was caught looking at the other, they would both just grin and turn slightly pink. It was... weird._

 _"Do you know what's going on with Jude and Connor?" Jesus asked Mariana one day, about a week after Callie's adoption. His sister frowned._

 _"What do you mean?" Mariana asked, popping a few pieces of popcorn into her mouth from the bowl on the kitchen table._

 _"Come on, you've been with them all summer. You haven't noticed how they seem to be acting all... couple-y?" Jesus asked, biting his lip, thinking of the only way to describe it. Mariana snickered, covering her hand with her mouth. "What's so funny?" Jesus asked. Was he missing something? All he knew was that when he left for boarding school Jude and Connor were on good terms again. But, Jesus still had his slight suspicions of his brother's friend._

 _"Oh, nothing, Jesus. I just have no idea what you're talking about," Mariana explained, shrugging, a smirk playing on her lips. Jesus narrowed his eyes and opened his mouth to speak before she interrupted. "Hey, you never sent back my good headphones. Do you still have them?" she questioned._

 _"Yeah, they're in my room," Jesus explained._

 _"Could you get them for me?" Mariana answered instantly, grinning._

 _"Uh, sure..." Jesus agreed, furrowing his eyebrows at his sister's strange behavior. Was everyone in this house going nuts?_

 _Jesus turned on his heal and jogged up the stairs, walking across to his room. Jesus raised an eyebrow as he saw the bedroom door closed. What the..?_

 _He pushed open the door and his jaw dropped, his eyes going wide at the sight in front of him. Connor and Jude sat on Jude's bed, their lips attached in an apparently, heated make out session. Jude's eyes flew open as the door opened and him and Connor jumped to opposite sides of the bed. Jude breathed a sigh as he saw his older brother in the doorway._

 _"It's just Jesus," Jude muttered. Relief washed over Connor's panicked features and he simply nodded. Jesus open and closed his mouth like a fish out of water, looking at his brother and his... welll, Jesus wasn't sure what Connor was to Jude anymore._

 _"What? But I though-"_

 _"No one told you?" Jude asked, raising an eyebrow as he sat down beside Connor again._

 _"Told me...?" Jesus shook his head, still unable to understand what had just happened._

 _"Jude's my boyfriend," Connor stated proudly, grabbing Jude's hand, a smile lighting his features as he met Jude's eyes._

 _"But weren't you just with that Daria girl?" Jesus questioned. "And aren't you straight?" Jesus asked. He was confused. He had suspected it for a long time, and it honestly wasn't that surprising. But, walking in on your thirteen year old brother making out with his boyfriend that you didn't know about will leave you asking stupid questions._

 _"No..." Connor mumbled, rubbing the back of his neck. "I, uh, used Daria as a cover up. I'm gay," Connor explained, slouching as he admitted what he'd done for what felt like the millionth time. Jude put his arm around Connor's shoulders, frowning._

 _"Seriously Jesus, no one told you we were together?" Jude questioned, looking up from Connor._

 _"Uh, no," Jesus answered, his eyes still wide. "But, I don't think I'll ever be able to forget it with that image seared into my brain," Jesus mumbled, blinking rapidly and shaking his head. He watched Jude and Connor laugh at the comment._

 _"Yeah, uh, could you not tell Moms about that? We really don't need to get the sex talk... again," Jude whispered the last part. Jesus' eyes went wide._

 _"AGAIN?!" he questioned, staring at his brother. How was this the same boy who had come to them a year ago?_

 _Jude chuckled nervously. "Uh, yeah, we kinda got caught about a week ago at Connor's house. But, we also didn't have shirts on then, so," Jude mumbled. Connor glanced at Jesus nervously, his jaw shifting._

 _"Oh, my god. I did not need to hear that. Yeah, Jude, I won't tell Moms, just please try to keep... that," Jesus started, motioning with his hand to the two of them. "To a minimum," Jesus finished. He walked over to his desk and picked up his headphones, he then turned back to the boys, who were talking softly. "Oh, and Connor?" the sandy haired boy looked over at the older teen. "I'm assuming Callie, Brandon, and Mari already gave you the 'don't break his heart' speech?" Jesus questioned. He saw Connor gulp._

 _"Uh, yeah," Connor muttered, looking at Jude who was rolling his eyes and glaring at Jesus._

 _"So you got the gist?" Jesus asked, smirking as Connor nodded his head slowly. "Okay, good. Small reminder, I got a scholarship for wrestling," he added, watching Connor glance over at Jude, who was still glaring daggers at Jesus. "Later, boys!" Jesus called as he jogged down the stairs and back into the kitchen._ _"Thanks for the warning!" he told Mariana as he tossed her the headphones. She laughed and shook her head and shrugged, catching the headphones._

 _"Sorry!"_

[][][][][][][]

Jesus lifted his eyes again as Connor sat down. He seemed to doing a lot of looking down lately. "How'd it go?" Jesus questioned, raising his eyebrows at the boy.

"She's freaking out, like I thought she would. She told me she hopes I'm okay," Connor summed up, his eyes focusing on the ground.

Jesus frowned and placed a hand on Connor's shoulder. "You will be," Jesus promised. Connor looked up, his eyes narrowed in a glare.

"I _am_ okay," Connor spoke determinedly, shrugging Jesus' hand off his shoulder. Jesus took a breath and closed his eyes briefly.

"Okay..." Jesus mumbled, watching Connor shake his head and turn to face the other direction. Jesus knew the boy was anything but okay. But, Jesus didn't want to pester him, he knew that never got anyone anywhere. So, he kept quiet and glanced around at his family. Mariana was sitting a few chairs away from him, her fingers tapping against her phone screen rapidly, her face empty of expression. Brandon stood, leaned against the wall, his eyes drifting in space. Stef and Callie were in Jude's room, while Lena was in the cafeteria, getting food that the family would probably ignore.

How long would this last? When was Jude going to wake up? Would he wake up? Three days. Only three days. Jesus knew that it would sometimes take months for coma patients to wake up.

Months. Jesus couldn't wait months. No one could.

* * *

 **Yes, another short one! The next one will be MUCH longer, I promise, and the next one will also have a few special guests :3! So, stay tuned!**

 **Ask me shit and follow me on Tumblr at jonnorlandfill. Plz I need friends.**

 **I don't own The Fosters or anything you recognize.**

 **-HJ**


	5. Day 4: Surprise, Surprise, Surprise

_**Day 4: Surprise, Surprise, Surprise**_

Connor groaned, standing from his chair and kicking the ground. "I'm so sick of just waiting here!" He exclaimed. He was answered by five sighs, and one nod of agreement from Jesus.

"Connor, love, you know there's nothing we can do," Stef stated calmly, standing herself and placing her arm around his shoulders. Connor took a deep breath and shook his head. He knew she was right, but he couldn't help but feel like there was _something, anything_ they could do. He was still alive. He was still breathing. Why couldn't he just wake up? Connor stepped away from Stef and glanced at the others.

"I'm gonna go... get a drink," he muttered, turning toward the door to the hallway.

"Wait, Connor, I'll come with you," Mariana offered, standing up.

"No thanks, I'd rather be alone," Connor told her, not looking back and walking out into the hallway. He made his way past the nurses and doctors and headed outside the hospital, sitting down on the side walk off to the side.

He kept his eyes on the ground, fumbling with his fingers. He took a breath, closing his eyes. Why was this so hard? He knew Jude was alive. He was still there, he could still wake up. But there was still that nagging voice in the back of Connor's head. _He might not wake up. And so what if he does? He might not remember you._

Connor's breaths became shaky as tears came to his eyes at the thought. He couldn't help but just _miss_ Jude. The broken body of the boy he loved wasn't what he wanted. He wanted Jude's smile. Jude's sarcasm. Jude's humor. Jude's laugh. But, most of all he just missed talking to Jude. About anything or nothing at all. Jude was so important to him. Jude wasn't only the boy that made him realize he was gay, stand up to his dad, and realize he deserved a better home life, but he was also just genuinely amazing. He was just himself. He didn't care what anyone else thought. He was kind, he was real, he was understanding.

Connor felt the tears rolling down his cheeks. He leaned forward and rested his head on his knees. He couldn't loose Jude. Connor jumped as he felt a body sit down beside him. He lifted his head from his knees and sighed as he saw Mariana sitting beside him, staring out in the parking lot.

"I thought I told you I'd rather be alone," Connor mumbled, crossing his arms and placing them on his knees.

"You did. But, I also said the same thing when Mom got shot," she started, turning her head to look at Connor who was looking back. "And I didn't. And, Mom said the same thing when Brandon got beat up. And she didn't," she finished, smiling sadly at him. Connor shook his head and turned forward, resting his head on his arms.

"Well, I did mean it," Connor persisted, rubbing his cheek against his sleeve to rid his face of the tears that had come free before Mariana came to him. Mariana frowned, shaking her head at him.

"Connor, you really think that I don't know you well enough by now? Not only have you been over so many times, I know what your morning breath smells like," Mariana spoke, laughing and Connor allowed himself to laugh with her. "But, Jude talks about you non-stop when you two aren't together," she finished. Connor smiled softly.

"Really?" Connor asked, looking at her almost hopefully. Connor knew how much Jude cared for him. But, things like that were just nice to hear. Especially in times like this.

Mariana returned the smile. "Yes. He loves you _so_ much," she assured him. Connor smiled, nodding.

"I know. He loves you guys, too," Connor added. Mariana breathed a laugh.

"Yeah, we know," she answered, smiling. They fell into silence for a moment before Mariana spoke. "I'm sorry about your dad," she said sincerely. Connor breathed out, then nodded.

"Yeah. You know, when I found out about this and I came here..." Connor paused, gulping and taking a breath, feeling tears forming in his eyes. "I thought, maybe, now he would just let it go. Just be there for me. But, no, he just did what he always does. He yelled and acted like I wasn't even worth the time of day," Connor paused, his breath hitching. He looked at Mariana who had moved her hand onto his back. Her eyebrows were scrunched, her eyes shimmering from her own tears forming as she looked at him. Her lips formed a frown, and she had a small pout on them. "You know, he was the scariest person to come out to. How screwed up is that? Isn't he supposed to be the easiest to come out to?" Connor asked, taking a few shaky breaths and closing his eyes tightly as he felt tears slip.

Mariana rubbed small circles in his back, scooting closer to Connor. "It'll get better, Con."

"Will it?" Connor asked, his voice laced with hostility. His head shot up and he looked at her with narrowed eyes, his jaw shifting as tears rolled down his cheeks. Mariana looked at him, her gaze unwavering.

"Yes." she stated with certainty. Connor shook his head and looked away from her, facing forward and resting his chin on his arms.

"I'm not sure that's true anymore, Mari," Connor mumbled. Mariana's bottom lip jutted out in a small pout as she thought. She blew out a breath before standing up.

"Let's go back inside, alright?" she asked, holding out her hand for Connor to take. Connor looked up at her, then back at her hand in front of his face. He sighed, then uncrossed his arms and grabbed her hand, pulling himself up with her help. Connor stepped back onto the side walk and Mariana placed her arm gingerly around his shoulders and led him toward the door.

"Connor!" The boy froze as he heard the voice call for him. His breath hitched and his eyes went wide as he looked at Mariana with a panicked expression. Her mouth was open, forming an 'O' shape, and she turned, her eyes flickering between Connor and the man who came jogging toward them.

"Connor," Adam Stevens spoke as he reached his son and Mariana. He looked out of breath and his eyes were red around the edges. He looked between Connor and Mariana, and his eyes then settled on the girl. "Uh, it's Mariana, right?" he questioned, furrowing his eyebrows at the girl. Mariana nodded hesitantly, her mouth closing as she did so. "Well, Mariana, could you give me a second with my son?" he asked, looking back at Connor. The boy had never seen his father look like this. He was almost pleading.

But, still Connor looked at Mariana with his own pleading look, begging her not to leave him alone with his father. Mariana gave him a sympathetic look, before looking back at Adam. "Okay," she looked back at Connor. "I'll be inside, if you need anything just text one of us, okay?" she asked, glancing at Adam with a glare. Her shock had worn off and now she was just pissed at the man who had hurt Connor.

"Uh, yeah," Connor nodded. Mariana gave him a stiff smile, squeezed his shoulder, and then jogged inside. Connor turned back toward his father, forcing his walls up and the sadness to the back of his brain. He looked at his father with narrowed eyes. "What do you want, Dad?" Connor asked. The word 'dad' came out of his mouth more like venom than a word he would give to a caregiver. Adam's face fell, and he took a breath, looking away from Connor briefly, rubbing his nose.

"Connor, I-" Adam paused, closing his eyes, then opening them and meeting Connor's eyes. They were just like his, Adam noted, shaking his head before speaking. "Connor, I know you think that I don't accept you-"

" _Think?_ I know you don't! You haven't said one good thing about it since I came out. You haven't even made an effort to get to know Jude, and now you might not have to!" Connor shouted, voicing his fears. He was taken aback when he watched his dad flinch at his words.

Adam cleared his throat and spoke again. "Don't say that. I might not have gotten to know Jude, but I know plenty to know, that kid is a fighter and no matter what he'll pull through," Adam spoke firmly. Connor took a step back, his eyes widening as his father spoke. He fumbled for words, but he didn't have to, as Adam started to speak. "And I'm sorry for that. I want to explain myself. You have to take into account, Connor, that I have had to deal with all of this so fast. You came out, and two days later you told me you're dating Jude. Yes, I know I should have been more accepting in the first place, but I wasn't and we both have to deal with that. And then, only three months after all this, I finally managed to get close to it, when I catch you two making out without shirts. That in itself was horrifying for a father, but it scared me, Connor, and I got mad about the wrong thing," Adam rambled, moving his hands and making gestures as he explained himself. But, then his eyes turned sad. "And then you asked to move in with your mother. I knew I had to get it together. I tried to get you to stay. I don't know why I got so upset that you had decided to stay because Jude was hurt. Maybe it was because I knew you would leave after he was better and I wanted to deal with the loss sooner rather than later," Adam paused, running a hand through his hair. He closed his eyes, putting both his hands in front of him. "The point is Connor; I'm sorry. I am so, so sorry for all the pain I have caused you, but I am not going to let you go through this alone," the man finished, taking a deep breath from his rush of words.

Connor stared at his father open-mouthed. Had he heard all that right? But, Connor forced his anger up again. "I'm not alone. I have the Adams Fosters," Connor started. "While you've been unable to be there for me, they have. They accepted Jude and I both wholeheartedly and were perfectly okay with our relationship. They didn't freak out about what happened, but instead were calm and just gave Jude the sex talk, which I wouldn't have wanted, fair warning," Connor paused, shaking his head. "And you know what they said when I told them I was going to go to LA? They said that they were happy I knew what would make me feel safe and that they would miss me. They have been my family for the past year while you have just been the man I live with. I know it takes time, Dad. But, you've had almost five months-"

"I know. But, I'm ready now. You're my son Connor, and I love you. I want to get to know you as you really are. And I hope when that boyfriend of yours wakes up, I can get to know him," Connor's eyes went wide, and he took a few steps back, while Adam smiled.

"Did you just call Jude-"

"Yeah. I told you, I'm trying," Adam answered. Connor nodded slowly.

"Okay... okay," Connor spoke, looking at his dad and feeling a small smile form on his face.

"Now, why don't we sit down, and you can tell me everything," Adam told Connor, sitting down on the sidewalk. Connor nodded and sat beside his father and started talking. About Jude, about the Adams Fosters, about everything. And Adam sat quietly and listened.

Wow, was this different from three months ago.

[][][][][][][]

 _Connor focused his eyes on the ground, making sure he wasn't putting his crutches over any rocks or cracks. He had memorized the walk to the Adams Foster home by now, so it wasn't hard for him to keep on the path and make sure he didn't fall over at the same time. Connor lifted his eyes as he approached the home, smiling as he saw Jude in the street, bouncing a basketball in front of the hoop._

 _Connor stopped walking, leaning on his crutches for support as he watched Jude throw the ball toward the hoop, but miss, instead hitting against the backboard and falling back. Jude moved forward and grabbed the ball, trying to keep it from getting too far. Connor balanced on his crutches again and walked forward the rest of the way. He stepped off the sidewalk and leaned himself and his crutches against Stef's car, watching as Jude played, a grin lighting his features. When Jude finally noticed him, he looked at Connor with a grin._

 _"Hey! What are you doing here?" Jude asked, holding the ball in front of him and turning his body toward Connor. He looked at Connor, a small smile on his lips, but his eyebrows knit together in confusion._

 _"Came to see if you were alright. How'd your dad do after we left?" Connor asked. The confusion dissolved off Jude's face, but it was replaced with worry and he took a step toward Connor._

 _"He was fine. He just wanted me to accept who I am and not be afraid to tell people," Jude explained. Connor nodded, then smiled and held up his hands for Jude to throw the basketball to him. Jude laughed, rolling his eyes and doing so. Connor caught it with practiced ease and laughed, holding onto it. Connor's face dropped, his thoughts traveling to the lunch they had had earlier._

 _"Why did your dad lie about what he did before?" Connor asked, tilting his head. Jude looked down, then moved forward and leaned against the hood of the car beside Connor._

 _"I told him to," Jude explained, looking over at Connor._

 _"Is that a habit of yours? Lying about your dad?" Connor half-teased, looking over at Jude, thinking of when Jude had lied to him about his father._

 _"No... it's just, it's a personal thing, you know? If we had told your dad that mine was in jail, he would have asked why and then the whole ordeal with my mom would have had to be explained again. And besides, I don't think I'm ready for your dad to know you have a boyfriend with such a terrible past," Jude explained, looking at Connor and giving him a half-smile. Connor frowned. He moved the basketball to the ground, making sure it didn't roll away before grabbing Jude's hand._

 _"Jude, I'm proud to have you as my boyfriend, no matter how many screwed up things happened to you before. But, if you don't want him to know, he doesn't have to," Connor told him. Jude nodded, smiling softly and squeezing Connor's hand. They sat in silence for a few moments before Jude looked up and spoke what he'd been thinking since Connor came back_

 _"Are you okay? I mean... after your dad's freak out. He was pretty hard on you," Jude questioned gently. Connor sighed, his eyelids falling close to closed and his jaw shifting. He looked back at Jude, frowning._

 _"He's still working on the whole... accepting me thing. He's gotten better. At least he lets us be together," Connor reasoned, looking away. Jude sat up, looking at Connor and frowning. He had avoided the question all together._

 _"Connor, are you okay?" Jude questioned, standing in front of his boyfriend, still gripping his hand._

 _Connor paused, dropping his gaze to the ground, then around at the houses. He then looked at Jude. "Jude... you've been in unaccepting homes before, right?" he mumbled. Jude nodded. "It's kinda like that, only my dad's not abusive."_

 _"Yes, he is," Jude protested. "Emotional abuse is still abuse!" Jude stated, determination on his features. Connor shifted his jaw again and looked away from him. Connor finally looked back at Jude._

 _He stood up, balancing on his good foot. "I will be fine, I promise. He's working on it," Connor explained, pulling Jude closer to him by the hand. Jude frowned, but wrapped his arms around Connor's waist. Connor stepped back, so he was leaning against the car again and wrapped his own arms around Jude's shoulders. He nuzzled his head in one of Jude's shoulders and sighed._

 _"You still didn't answer my question..." Jude muttered against Connor's shoulder._

 _Connor sighed, closing his eyes and nodded his head. "I will be." But he wasn't sure. Connor knew that Jude could tell, but neither of them said anything. They just hugged, enjoying each other's comfort._

[][][][][][][]

"You really do love him, huh?" Adam asked. Connor looked at him with a sad expression, but nodded, a small smile grazing his lips.

"Yeah... I do," Connor answered, glancing at the hospital.

"I'm sure he feels the same," Adam commented.

"He does," Connor corrected, his smile growing as he thought of the first time they'd said it.

"Oh, yeah? When'd that happen?" Adam asked, a small smirk on his face.

Connor hesitated, rubbing the back of the neck. "Remember when I went to Callie's adoption?" Connor asked. Adam nodded, urging Connor to continue. "Well, she made this speech before the judge had her officially adopted. She was talking about how terrible the system was, but also about how she was safe and happy. And, then, afterwards, before we left the courthouse, Jude pulled me aside. He told me that he hadn't understood why I wanted to go live with Mom, but when he was watching me while Callie was talking he realized I deserved a home where I felt happy and safe and to have a family that was there for me. And he said he wanted me to have it because he loves me," Connor finished, his eyes on the ground, a grin on his face and his cheeks heating up.

Adam laughed, nodding. "Sounds like he does. I'm sorry about the circumstances it had to be for him to say it, but I'm glad he did," the man told his son. Connor nodded, then stood up.

"I should go back inside. Stef and Lena are probably worried, I said I was just getting a drink," Connor explained. Adam nodded, standing up as well.

"Okay. I'll head home then, but I want you to call me if anything happens, alright?" Adam questioned. Connor nodded, then stepped forward and hugged his father. Adam was shocked by the action, but hugged his son back with a smile. Adam and Connor pulled away, smiling at each other. Adam patted Connor's shoulder. "I love you, son, I'll see you later, okay?"

"You, too, Dad. Later," Connor dismissed, waving to his father as he walked back onto street and toward the parking lot. Connor shook his head, nibbling on his bottom lip. He couldn't believe that had just happened. Connor reached his hand up and pinched his inner elbow, making sure that he hadn't just drifted off in his chair in the hospital and dreamed the whole thing. "Ow!" he whispered, feeling pain shoot through his arm. He couldn't help the smile that grew on his face. So, his dad was _really_ changing.

Connor shook his head and pushed open the double doors to the hospital and made his way back toward the comfortable waiting room. The group glanced up as he came in, but remained silent. Connor sat down next to Mariana, who leaned over, resting a hand on his shoulder.

"You okay?" she whispered. Connor looked at her and nodded, giving her a small smile to back up the action. Mariana returned the smile. "Good," she muttered, dropping her hand from his shoulder and placing it on the armrest between her and Connor. Connor glanced around the room, furrowing his eyebrows. Something was missing...

Jesus sat beside the door to the hallway leading to the exit, his phone out, tapping against the screen. Brandon was near the water fountain, pouring water into a small plastic cup. Callie sat a few seats down from Connor and Mariana, her eyes on her phone screen, seeming to be editing a picture. Stef was beside Callie, her hand on her daughter's back, mumbling words to her that Connor couldn't hear. Lena. Where was Lena?

Connor looked over at Mariana. "Where's Lena?" he questioned, tilting his head. Mariana looked back over at him.

"Uh, Jude's dad, Donald came by. She's with him in Jude's room," Mariana explained. Connor nodded, but his face showed his confusion. Why was Donald only coming now? Had he only just gotten the news? Or had he just not had time to come down? Connor figured it was the former. The Adams Fosters had been so distressed and in their own heads, that Mike and AJ hadn't even heard what happened until Stef called in sick for work on Monday, and Mike had called to make sure she was okay.

Connor tapped his fingers against his armrest, trying to slow his thoughts. They had been racing for four days straight, and Connor needed to calm himself down, at least a little bit, before he saw Jude's dad. He knew Jude's dad was completely okay with them, but the first time they met, he was introduced as Jude's friend. Now he knew that they were boyfriends. Plus that fact that they were meeting again under the circumstances of Jude's possible death wasn't exactly a comforting thought. Was Donald going to blame him, like Callie had? But, then again, Donald had been the one to stand up for Connor when his father had found out that the school knew he was gay. Maybe Donald wouldn't be as quick to blame as Callie was.

He lifted his eyes as he heard footsteps coming from the hallway. He watched as Donald and Lena walked back into the waiting room, talking softly to one another. Connor bit his lip, watching as Donald looked back around the room, his eyes landing on Connor. Donald moved toward Connor, a small smile on his face. Lena left Donald's side and went over to join her wife and Callie.

"Uh, it's Connor, right?" Donald asked, smiling down at Connor. Connor looked up, hesitantly meeting Donald's eyes.

"Y-yeah," he answered, standing up, so he was only a few inches below Donald, rather than sitting in front of the man.

"Jude's boyfriend, correct?" Donald asked. Connor nodded, glancing down at his feet. "Okay. Well, Connor, it is nice to properly meet you. You seem to make Jude happy," Donald commented.

Connor looked up at Donald and struggled to find his words. "I, er, I try to," Connor decided on his response, shrugging his shoulders. Donald nodded.

"You know, you're almost all he talks about during our phone calls. I heard about what happened with your dad. Guess my little push didn't do much, huh?" Donald asked.

"Uh, no, it did. He was way better after that. But, it wasn't enough," Connor shrugged. "But, I'm not going to leave while Jude's in the hospital, that's just not an option," he continued, determined.

Donald nodded. "I understand. But, when he wakes up, I hope you can do what will make you feel safe. I've got to go, but I will be back everyday to see Jude. I'll see you around, Connor," Donald dismissed, smiling and patting Connor's arm before walking out the door to the exit. Connor released a breath he didn't know he had been holding. Donald didn't blame him, and that was something. Connor looked back down as he felt Mariana nudge him.

"You make a good first impression," she teased. Connor laughed softly and nodded, shaking his head. He looked over at Stef and Lena.

"Can I go back in and see him?" he asked them. He felt like he needed to see Jude. Talk to him, even if Jude couldn't talk back or even listen.

Lena looked up, as did Stef. "Yeah, sure you can, love. You want one of us to go with you?" Stef asked. Connor shook his head.

"I wanna be alone with him for a few minutes, if that's okay," Connor explained.

"Of course," Lena assured, smiling. Connor nodded and went through the door, making his way down the hall and to Jude's room. He pushed the door open and found himself in the chair beside Jude's bed almost instantly, pouring everything he'd been thinking for the past four days out of his mouth and toward the boy who couldn't even hear him.

Or so he thought.

* * *

 **Yes, I'm an asshole.**

 **Follow me on Tumblr at jonnorlandfill.**

 **I do not own The Fosters or anything you recognize.**

 **-HJ**


	6. Day 5: Fighting Soul

_**Day 5: Fighting Soul**_

Brandon pushed the headphone cord into the jack of his keyboard. He gripped both headphones and placed them on his head, adjusting them so they fit. It had been one of those days when Lena and Stef had forced the kids back home for the day. They would go back in the morning, Stef had promised. When the six of them had gotten there (Connor excluded because he had gone back to his dad's house to get some of his clothes), they had all separated from their moms, grumbling about how it was dumb that they had been forced home. Brandon thought it just added to everyone's pain. The house just reminded them of their younger brother. Jude's presence was lingering in the house. The boy's things littered around his room, his jacket hung on the rack near the door, the nail polish bottle that was half-unscrewed from the last time he'd used it. When Brandon had found out it was like someone had stabbed him in the stomach, and with each reminder of his brother, it was like someone was twisting the knife each time.

Brandon knew that Stef and Lena were in the kitchen downstairs talking and Callie and Mariana were in the living room, trying to distract themselves using the TV. Jesus and Connor, having returned from his father's a few hours ago, were in Jesus and Jude's room, probably in silence. Brandon sat in front of his keyboard, alone - against his mothers' wishes - and trying to drown himself in his music. Brandon bit his lip and sighed. The only song he could think of at the moment was Hey Jude, just his luck. He gave in and started playing, hearing the familiar melody fill his ears through his headphones.

He took a breath and started to sing softly. " _Hey Jude, don't make it bad. Take a sad song and make it better,_ " Brandon paused, allowing himself to change the lyrics to better fit his brother. " _Remember to let him into your heart. Then you can start to make it better. Hey Jude, don't be afraid. You were made to go and get him. The moment you let him under your skin. Then you begin to make it better,_ " Brandon continued to sing, letting his thoughts wonder. The song wasn't wrong, Jude always made things better. He also seemed to take anything the world threw at him. Except this. When they had gotten the call, it had been a shock to everyone.

[][][][][][][]

 _"I am so terrified to eat this," Brandon commented, smirking at his sisters. "Ow!" he exclaimed as Callie hit his arm from beside him._

 _"Callie, don't hit your brother," Stef commented almost on reflex. Callie rolled her eyes and took a bite from her plate._

 _"Is it good?" he asked, smirking as she glared at him._

 _"Honestly, Brandon, you think that Momma would let us get near the food if we were bad cooks?" Mariana asked, earning an agreement from Callie._

 _"I seem to remember a burnt lasagna incident from last week that begs to differ, Mari," Jesus teased, pointing his fork at his twin. Mariana rolled her eyes._

 _"Good thing she wasn't in charge of the oven then, huh?" Lena defended, putting her hand on Mariana's shoulder briefly. Jesus shrugged, then looked over at Brandon._

 _"Together?" Jesus asked, raising an eyebrow and looking at the spaghetti on his plate._

 _"Yup," Brandon agreed, tapping his fork against Jesus in a small 'cheers' action. In unison, the two lifted a small amount of the food onto their forks and twirled the pasta around it. Brandon lifted the fork gingerly to his lips and took the bite, licking his lips of the sauce. "Okay, I'll admit, it's not bad," he finally spoke, swallowing, looking at Jesus who nodded in agreement._

 _"Thank you!" Callie, Mariana, and Lena spoke together. Stef laughed, shaking her head at her family._

 _"Hey, where's Jude?" Brandon asked, already knowing the answer._

 _"Where do you think?" Callie responded, smirking and glancing at her siblings._

 _"At Connor's," the entire table spoke together, laughing as they did so. Brandon shook his head._

 _"Are we ever gonna have him back?" Mariana questioned, a smirk on her lips._

 _"Yeah, it's like he's only visiting when he's here now," Jesus added, laughing._

 _"Come on guys, you know he's trying to get any time he can before Connor leaves," Lena interjected, shaking her head at her kids._

 _"Why couldn't they do that here?" Brandon offered._

 _"Because, I assume, that Adam wants the same thing," Stef explained._

 _"Why?" Callie asked, raising an eyebrow. "Isn't he the reason Connor is leaving in the first place?" she reasoned._

 _"Look, I know it might not seem like it. But, Adam does care about Connor. Even if he did drive him out, Connor is still his son," Lena explained, shaking her head at Callie._

 _Brandon looked away from Lena, rolling his eyes. He just thought it was dumb that Adam could be so judgmental, yet still say he loves his son. Connor was moving to LA to get away from him for crying out loud! The conversation continued to flow around the table, the topic changing._

 _It was a few hours later when they were all in the living room watching a movie. Stef had left to go pick up Jude from Connor's._

 _"What's taking Mom so long? It's been almost an hour," Jesus commented, leaning over Callie to grab a handful of popcorn from the bowl in Mariana's lap._

 _"Uh, I don't know, I'll give her a call," Lena decided, sitting up and grabbing her phone. She paused as her phone started buzzing in her hand._

 _"Who is it?" Brandon asked, looking over at Lena._

 _"Sacred Cross... I'll be back in a second," Lena answered, standing up and walking into the dining room. The four siblings looked at each other, concerned._

 _"Why would Sacred Cross be calling Momma?" Brandon asked._

 _"I have no idea," Mariana spoke, looking at Lena who was talking quietly in the dining room. The kids watched Lena from their spots on the couch, trying to see what was happening by Lena's facial expressions. Brandon's eyes darted toward his siblings as he saw Lena gasp and cover her mouth. Lena spoke frantically into the phone before hanging up and going into the living room._

 _"Momma, what happened?" Callie spoke up immediately. Lena looked at her kids, her face showing fear and worry. Brandon could tell she was considering not telling them. Then, Lena shook her head, breathing a sigh._

 _"Mom and Jude were in a car accident. We have to get to the hospital," she explained, grabbing her purse from the hanger by the door. Brandon's eyes went wide, and he bolted up, his siblings following his lead as they rushed to get their shoes on and get into the car. Questions filtered through the car, but not one got answered. And the one that was avoided the most was the one that was gnawing at all of their hearts. Were they okay?_

[][][][][][][]

" _Nah nah nah, hey Jude,_ " Brandon finished, holding out the last note. He breathed a sigh, rubbing the back of his neck. Maybe he should write something? Brandon smiled as he thought of it. Come to think of it, he had written songs about all his siblings. Except Jude. Then again, his song about Callie wasn't exactly sibling-like, but that's not the point.

Brandon pulled off his headphones and placed them on the keyboard. He rolled his chair back toward his small filing cabinet in the corner of his music area. He pulled a few blank pieces of music paper out of the first drawer and then rolled back over to the desk where his keyboard laid. He put the papers beside his keyboard, then grabbed a pencil and wrote "Jude's Song" on top of the paper. He dropped the pencil back on top of the papers and then pulled his headphones over his ears again and bit his lip. He hovered his fingers over the keys, then began to play. He found himself starting with the tune he had added to the song about his family. The part he had told Callie was like Jude.

As Brandon's fingers flew across the keys, he realized that it was truth. The tune was in a major key, so it sounded upbeat, like Jude always tried to be. It was calming, like Jude always was, but then it would speed up, much like when Jude would get angry. He forced himself to stop playing, then swiftly jotted down what he had already played. His hands were back on the keys in seconds and he played until he couldn't feel his fingers. He took a breath as he played the ending, then jotted down the rest of the song.

He pulled off his headphones, smiling down at his work. _Now a title._ He thought, biting his lip.

"You're really good."

Brandon jumped as he heard the voice, closing his eyes briefly and placing a hand on his chest. He whirled his chair around, narrowing his eyes at Connor who was standing just behind the beaded doorway. He wasn't angry as much as he was annoyed at the boy for startling him.

"Sorry," Connor mumbled, pushing himself through the beads. Brandon shook his head. He couldn't freak out at the boy, especially when he looked so sad.

"It's okay. How'd you hear me?" Brandon asked. He had been wearing headphones. Connor didn't respond, but just pointed at Brandon's keyboard. Brandon furrowed his eyebrows, then turned to look at it, then groaned as he noticed that the headphone cord had fallen out. "Well, that explains why it sounded louder. I wasn't paying attention, really," he explained to Connor, scratching his ear. The boy nodded, his eyes fixing on his shoes.

"What was it for?" Connor asked finally, looking up at Brandon.

"Um, it wasn't exactly for anything," Brandon started. "I use music to get away from everything. I was actually just writing that for Jude," he explained, standing up and picking up the music, stuffing it in the notebook on the other side of his keyboard. Connor nodded.

"It reminded me of him," Connor commented, leaning against the door frame.

"That was the goal," Brandon laughed, standing up. He walked past Connor and into the main part of his room, tossing the notebook onto his shelf, then sitting down on his bed. Connor turned, following him into the room. "Why'd you come in anyway? Usually everyone just ignores me when I play," Brandon questioned, patting the spot on his bed for Connor to sit. Connor sat down hesitantly, then shrugged.

"Jesus and I heard you singing _Hey Jude._ Jesus just rolled his eyes and went downstairs. But, I wanted to listen. Then you started playing the song, and it made me think of him, so I came in here to hear better," Connor explained, looking down and playing with his fingers. Brandon smiled and nodded.

"You doing okay?" Brandon asked, looking at Connor slightly concerned. Connor took a breath, then shook his head.

"Not really. It's hard, not having him around, and knowing that he could die. I'm really terrified, Brandon," Connor answered slowly. Brandon frowned as he saw the boy's lip tremble, then watched as a tear fell from his eye and onto the bed.

"Hey, don't be. You know Jude better than anyone, do you really think he won't pull through?" Brandon asked, watching Connor lift his eyes.

"That's what everyone keeps saying. But it's nearly been a week, Brandon! And yeah, he hasn't gotten worse, but he hasn't gotten better either!" Connor exclaimed, his breath becoming heavy.

"Woah, Connor, calm down," Brandon tried to calm the boy, moving closer. Connor nodded, slowing his breaths and closing his eyes tightly, wiping his eyes.

"Sorry," Connor mumbled.

"It's alright. You're scared, we all are," Brandon assured him. Connor nodded.

"Um, I'll let you get back to that song," Connor muttered, standing up and rushing out of the room. Brandon sighed and shook his head, but stood up, grabbing the notebook off his shelf and pulled out the sheet music, grabbing a pencil and jotting down the title that had come to him.

 _Fighting Soul._ Brandon sat down and started writing down lyrics, smiling to himself. Maybe the song would be ready when Jude woke up.

* * *

 **I don't plan on writing the song, but if any of you wish to do so, I am not stopping you. Just a warning, next week won't be much of a chapter, but more of a collection of memories. Simply because, when you're in a hospital there are days when things are just dull, and all you have are the memories to get you through the day, so yeah. There might be one other chapter like that to come, but so far I haven't planned for it. Hope you guys liked this!**

 **Follow me and ask me things on Tumblr at jonnorfilth!**

 **I do not own The Fosters or anything you recognize.**

 **-HJ**


	7. Day 6: Remember When

**WARNING!:** **Abuse occurs in a flashback. Possibly triggering.**

 _ **Day 6: Remember When**_

There are days when you're sitting in a waiting room when everything under the sun is happening. But, then there are days like today. When everything is silent, no conversations spark, and time moves agonizingly slow. It's the time when you wish most that something would happen. It made all their hearts ache, just wanting Jude to wake up. But, that's not what happened.

No, instead they all were forced into silence, but their heads were racketing. Every memory and moment of the boy in the hospital room were coming to the forefront of their brains, and it _hurt._ The fact that those things couldn't be happening in the present, but instead had already happened and just replayed over and over like a broken record.

Let's start with Callie. She sat, leaning sideways, her legs pulled onto the chair, her head rested against Stef's shoulder. The memory flowing through her brain was... well the one that had started _all_ of this. She hated Jim Pearson with all of her being for nearly killing Jude just because he wore a dress. But still, that had been what led them to the Fosters. To their home.

[][][][][][][]

 _Callie's eyes shifted as she heard the door open. She watched Jim move across the living room and toward the hallway, not moving her position from the couch._ Not drunk tonight? _She thought to herself. She rubbed her arm where a bruise from yesterday had formed. Something she'd gotten used to. She focused her eyes back on the TV that was playing some old soap opera that Callie never really payed attention to._

 _"What the hell!?" Callie heard Jim shout from somewhere in the house. She was on her feet instantly, knowing Jude might be in trouble. Her feet moved of their own accord, taking her down the hall and into Jim's bedroom. The middle aged man stood over her little brother, steam coming from his ears. Jude cowered at the feet of the man. He was wearing one of the dresses Callie had seen Jim staring at before, one of his ex-wife's._ Oh, no, Jude why? _She thought to herself, watching silently as Jim grabbed the front of the dress, pulling Jude up, so he was dangling in the air._

 _"What do you think you're doing?!" Jim shouted, spit flying from his mouth. Jude closed his eyes, tears slipping from his face._

 _"I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I'll take it off!" Jude shouted, his voice coming out even higher than usual as he fought against Jim's grasp. Jim lifted Jude higher, then threw the boy down. Jude screamed as he hit the floor._

No. No. No. No. _Callie thought, her eyes going wide as she watched. She could handle Jim hurting her. But, Jude? No. No one could touch him. She rushed forward as Jim bent down and began hitting every part of Jude he could reach. Callie choked on a sob as she saw blood come from Jude's broken skin._

 _"Leave him alone!" she screeched, hurling herself at her foster father. But, her attempt was futile, as Jim just kicked her in the stomach. She gasped, more tears slipping as she fell back on her knees, clutching her stomach._

 _"Go away!" Jim growled. Callie's face became hard. Her face set, anger clear on her face. She stood up, wobbling from her injury and grabbed the baseball bat from the corner of the room. She gripped it tightly in her hand and ran out of the room, out the door and onto the pavement. She threw her arms up, the baseball bat lifting above her head, then she brought it down on Jim's Trans Am. A satisfied grin spread across her face as she heard the windshield shatter. She lifted the wooden weapon up, bringing it back down on the hood of the car, watching the bat bounce against the metal, leaving a large dent behind._

 _"Hey, hey, what the hell do you think you're doing?!" Callie heard her foster father shout. She ignored him. He hurt Jude. He deserved it. She continued to hit the bat against the car, hitting every part she could when she felt a hand on her arm._

 _"Let go of me!" she shouted, turning to Jim and gripping the bat, threatening to swing it at him. Jim dropped his arm and stepped back, instead whipping out his phone and typing furiously against the screen. Callie ignored him and moved to the other side of the car, bringing the bat back and smashing it through the window. She felt glass prick her arms, but she kept going, not caring one bit. She heard the police sirens, but her mind couldn't process anything except the fact that Jim had been beating Jude. She hit the car, and hit the car, and hit the car again until she felt the bat was torn from her numb fingers and her arms were pulled behind her back._

 _"No! No! He was hurting Jude!" Callie shouted as the police shoved her into the police car. Callie blinked, shaking her head as she stared out the window to see her foster father smirking and Jude crying on the lawn, screaming at the police. Then Callie's mind began to process everything. Oh no. What had she done? She was going to be sent to Juvie and Jude was going to be stuck in that house. No. She decided. When she was out, Bill would take her to Jude. She would see him again._

[][][][][][][]

Callie felt the same as she did when she was in Juvie after that. Helpless to her brother who needed the most help. But, they all felt like that. Brandon sat on the other side of Stef, his elbows on his knees, rubbing his hands together. He was thinking of one of his happiest moments with Jude. It was some time after Jude had been adopted when the family was on their camping trip.

[][][][][][][]

 _"Okay, Jude, get in the tube," Brandon instructed, laughing. The family had dispersed about the lake and Brandon was planning to give his brother a ride around the lake._

 _"Do I gotta?" Jude laughed, shaking his wet hair._

 _Brandon joined his brother's laughter. "Yes, you gotta," he explained, hooking his arm in the tube. Jude rolled his eyes, then dunked his head underwater and Brandon felt Jude's foot kick his leg as the boy resurfaced inside the black tube. "That was just mean," Brandon shook his head. Jude rolled his eyes again, leaning back and hooking both his arms on the tube, then swinging his legs over the opposite side of the tube so he was now laying in the tube._

 _"Now what?" Jude asked, raising his eyebrows expectantly at Brandon. Brandon grinned and called for Jesus to bring over the rope on the shore. "Rope? I'm not so sure about this, this is getting close to one of those cheesy horror movie plots," Jude commented, sinking lower in the water, slipping one of his arms off the tube._

 _"Don't worry about it," Brandon rolled his eyes and then wrestled the rope away from Jesus. "Go dive under and see if you can find anything!" Brandon rolled his eyes at Jesus._

 _"There's nothing down there but leeches," Jesus commented, shaking his head._

 _"I didn't know Hayley was still here," Brandon jibed earning a glare from Jesus who swam away in the direction of Callie and Stef. Jude laughed, pulling himself back up on the tube._

 _"Okay, now what do you need the rope for?" Jude asked, raising his eyebrows at Brandon._

 _"This," Brandon explained, throwing the rope over the side of the tube and pulling the end around. He tied a double knot in the rope, making sure it stayed on the tube._

 _"Interesting. And why did you need to do that?" Jude asked, looking at Brandon with his eyebrows raised._

 _"For this," Brandon answered. He gripped the end of the rope he had and turned around, then kicked and swam, gaining as much speed as possible and swimming as fast as he could around the lake._

 _"Ah!" Jude screamed, laughter filling his voice. He held tightly to the tube._

 _"Having fun?" Brandon shouted over the sound of laughter and rushing water._

 _"Maybe!" Jude shouted back. If it had been a half hour ago, Brandon wouldn't have been doing this. But, after Jude's explosion at him and Callie, and rightfully so, Brandon had decided to stop treating Jude like a baby, because he wasn't. Jude was thirteen, he was old enough to be treated just as Brandon treated Jesus._

 _Brandon slid to a stop as they reached the dock, laughing along with his brother. "Fun, right?" Brandon asked, dropping the rope and looking over at Jude._

 _"Yeah," Jude agreed, laughing. He dropped his limbs from holding onto the tube and dove under the water. Brandon frowned when he didn't see Jude come back up a few moments later._

 _"Jude?" Brandon asked, moving forward._

 _"Bah!" Jude shouted from behind him. Brandon gasped, putting a hand on his bare chest, squeezing his eyes shut and catching his breath. Jude laughed, holding onto the dock to keep himself up._

 _"Oh, you're in for it now!" Brandon spoke, finally catching his breath. Brandon lunged for Jude, who let out a scream of laughter as they struggled in the water, the dispute from earlier long forgotten._

[][][][][][][]

Brandon smiled as he thought of it. It had been fun. A good part of the camping trip had. He glanced around at his family, frowning. His eyes settled on Mariana. She was sitting a few chairs down from Brandon, Lena on her side. Her eyes were closed softly, but he doubted she was sleeping. And she wasn't. Her own thoughts were on her favorite memory of Jude, which had only happened a few weeks prior.

[][][][][][][]

 _Mariana lifted her eyes as she heard the front door open and the sound of two teenage boys singing and laughing as they entered the house. Except the lyrics sounded different from the old song her moms had taught her._

 _"A little bit of Morgan in my life!" Jude sang doing a three sixty as he made it way into the kitchen._

 _"A little bit of Eric by my side!" Connor cheered back, grabbing Jude's hand as he slid in on socks, having left his shoes at the door._

 _"A little bit of Richard is all I need!" Jude followed Connor as he spun around, their hands clasped together._

 _"A little bit of Timothy is what a see!" Connor laughed mid lyric, taking both Jude's hands and moving them up and down in the air._

 _"A little bit of Samuel all night long!" The boys moved their feet, bending low, then coming back up._

 _"A little bit of Jeremy here I am!" Connor exclaimed, twirling Jude around. The two disconnected, pointing at each other as they finished the chorus to their own version of the song._

 _"A little bit of you makes me your man!" They sang together, bursting into laughter as they finished. Mariana had been watching the two, her hand covering her mouth and her laughs muffled. They apparently hadn't noticed her. She clapped her hands as Jude threw his arm around Connor's shoulder, both of them laughing, as they turned forward. Their faces dropped simultaneously as they saw Mariana and heard her clapping. Jude dropped his arm from Connor's shoulders._

 _"Nice performance, you guys. Thinking we should call American Idol," Mariana laughed, standing up and walking to the end of the table, leaning against it and watching the two exchange an eye roll._

 _"Shut up, Mariana, I seem to remember a few morning shower songs that you'd care to forget," Jude countered._

 _"I'd care to forget them, too," Connor teased, making a disgusted face and shaking his head. Jude snickered, leaning over and nuzzling Connor's cheek with his nose._

 _"Oh god, that was so sweet, I'm getting a cavity," Mariana commented, watching Jude press his lips on Connor's cheek instead. Connor turned pink while Jude just laughed and rolled his eyes. "But, I do have to ask where you learned to dance like that, and where you got those names from," Mariana stated, shaking her head at her brother and his boyfriend._

 _"Okay, first off, there's this cool thing. It's called Google, and you can find all these things, like boy names that sound like different girl names for instance," Jude stated sarcastically, making Connor laugh, burying his head in Jude's shoulder. Jude smiled, putting his arm on Connor's waist, laughter filtering his voice as Mariana glared at him. "And second, we just came up with it," he explained. He leaned his head against Connor's smiling softly. Mariana shook her head, smiling at her brother. Ever since Jude had told them Connor was moving to LA, Jude had seemed upset whenever she caught him alone. But, whenever he was with Connor, Jude's face always had a smile that could make anyone's day._

 _"Well, you have to teach me," she commented, her eyes on the two. Connor had lifted his arms and wrapped them around Jude, clasping them on Jude's shoulder where they met. He had lifted his head from Jude's shoulder, instead resting his chin there and watching Jude laugh. Jude had wrapped both his arms around Connor's waist, pulling him to his side._

 _"Yeah, maybe. If you bribe us, and find someone to do it with," Connor spoke up, turning his eyes from Jude's face._

 _Mariana's left eyebrow arched as she looked at the two. "Was that a jab, Stevens?" Mariana asked._

 _"At the fact that your thirteen year old brother can get a boyfriend and you can't? Yes, yes it was," Connor smirked, confidence lacing his tone. Connor had gotten much more comfortable with teasing Jude's siblings since Jude and him had started dating._

 _Mariana rolled her eyes, her lips pursed. "We can't all have your sickly sweet love story, though, can we?" Mariana commented._

 _"Love story? Is that what we're going with here? I like to think of it more as... a Love Adventure!" Jude laughed, looking at Connor with the love-sick look Mariana often saw her mothers give each other._

 _"Yes, it's a Love Adventure!" Connor agreed, looking back at Jude with the same look._

 _"Oh, look at that, admitting you love each other already!" Mariana teased, smirking. The two turned scarlet, sharing another look. Mariana's eyes went wide, and she sat up straight. "Oh my god, you have, haven't you!" she squealed, her hands going to cover her mouth. Connor was staring at Jude's chest, finding interest in the stripes on his boyfriend's shirt. Jude, however was looking at Mariana, biting his lip._

 _"Don't tell Moms, they'll never let us live it down," Jude stated. Mariana squealed, jumping up and down and then pulling the two flushed boys into a hug._

 _"Oh my god, I can't believe this! I thought you two seemed closer!" she giggled as the two pulled away from her, mumbling 'shut up's and 'oh my god, Mariana's. But, even though they were pulled away from Mariana, their arms were still tangled around each other._

 _"Can you not make this a big deal," Connor mumbled, his eyes on the ground. Mariana frowned, but then nodded._

 _"Yeah, of course! Your secret is safe with me!" Mariana exclaimed, turning and running out of the kitchen. And safe with Brandon, and Callie, and Jesus, and Tia, and everyone except Stef and Lena. Did they really except Mariana_ not _to tell anyone?_

[][][][][][][]

Mariana doubted that Jude and Connor knew she had told the rest of the family, except their Moms. But, they were all aware of the way the two felt about each other, so it's not like the other Adams Fosters were going to act any different. Jesus sat on her other side, his fingers tapping mindlessly against his phone screen. He was thinking of something that had happened nearly a year ago. Callie was still at Girls United, waiting to come home, when, as Jude called it, "The Pumpkin Goop War" had occurred.

[][][][][][][]

 _"You're telling me Moms trust a twelve year old with a sharp knife?" Jude questioned, raising his eyebrows at Jesus._

 _"No. You don't get to use the knife till next year, but you get to draw the design and I carve it out," Jesus explained. It was a Fosters family tradition for each of the family members to carve a pumpkin. Stef, Lena and Brandon had already done their's, and Mariana was waiting for the day Callie was allowed to visit so they could do their's together. Today, Jesus was helping Jude do his._

 _Jesus turned and grabbed a sharpie the mess of pumpkin guts on the table and handed it to Jude. "See, the trick is," Jesus started, uncapping his own sharpie and sticking the cap on the back of the marker. "to make it look as scary as possible. It's all about the eyes. Make them angry, evil. Give them eyebrows if you want. Then, the mouth has to have as many missing teeth as possible," Jesus explained, biting his lip as he drew on his pumpkin, watching Jude tilt his up and start carefully drawing._

 _"If were going for scary, I could just put a picture of you waking up on the pumpkin," Jude teased, laughing softly as he moved from the eyes of the pumpkin to the nose._

 _"Hey! I'm helping you with this, the least you could do is be nice!" Jesus laughed, rolling his eyes and recapping his sharpie, tossing it to the side._

 _"Fine," Jude mumbled, his eyes concentrating as he worked on the mouth. His eyebrows were knit together tightly, his eyes narrowed, and his mouth forming a small frown._

 _"Woah, calm down, Picasso, we're going for scary, not beautiful," Jesus laughed as Jude finished the last detail and capped his marker, placing it beside the pumpkin._

 _"Sue me for wanting it to look good!" Jude rolled his eyes, throwing his arms up._

 _Jesus laughed, shaking his head at his brother. He reached over, grabbing the knife off the counter. "Watch the attitude!" Jesus threatened, jabbing the knife in Jude's general direction._

 _"Hey!" Jude shouted, jumping away from the sharp object._

 _"I'm kidding, calm down little bro," Jesus rolled his eyes and stabbed the knife into his pumpkin, starting to carve. He popped out the eyes, nose, and mouth of his pumpkin, then placed the knife down. He moved the jack-o-lantern to the side, then brought Jude's in front of him. "Now watch, so you can do this next year," Jesus instructed, picking the knife back up. He gently pushed the tip of the knife into the top of the pumpkin's eye, then drew the knife around the eyes. He popped out the eye, then put it beside him. He continued with the other eye, the nose, the mouth, and the eyebrows. Jesus stood up and placed the knife in the sink, then turned back around. "Tada!" Jesus exclaimed, putting the pumpkins next to each other on the table._

 _"Cool!" Jude grinned._

 _"I know, right?" Jesus laughed, ruffling Jude's hair. "I'm gonna go put these with Moms' and Brandon's. Don't get into trouble, okay?" Jesus told his brother, picking up the jack-o-lanterns by the bottom, knowing they would fall if he held the tops._

 _"What am I gonna do, make pumpkin seeds?" Jude asked, lifting some of the pumpkin guts in his hand._

 _"Yes," Jesus teased, shaking his head as he walked out of the kitchen. He walked outside and placed the two pumpkins beside the other three on the steps. Jesus jogged back up the stairs and inside, making his way back in the kitchen. He gasped when he turned his head and felt something hit his shirt. He looked down and saw pumpkin guts sticking to his shirt._

 _Jesus lifted his head slowly, his mouth open and his eyes fixed in a glare. Jude sat beside the table, giggling, his hands sticky with orange goop. "Oh, you're in for it now!" Jesus shouted, moving forward and grabbing his own handful. And the Pumpkin Goop War began._

[][][][][][][]

Jesus thought it was funny how much things could change in a single year. In a single month, week, day, minute, second. So many things could change in so little time, it was ridiculous. When Jude had first come to the Foster household he had been an innocent, shy little boy who never talked back. Now he was a confident, sassy teenager who was in love with and dating his best friend. Crazy. Jesus glanced over at the boy who sat in one of the few chairs between Brandon and Lena, curled into it. Connor was hurting as he thought of Jude. Everything about him. Everything from when they met to the day of the accident. The one that seemed to stand out most, though, was the night of the LGBTQ+ prom.

[][][][][][][]

 _"Hey," Connor heard Jude speak. Connor turned to face him. "I'm Jude. And I'm gay," Jude stated confidently. Connor felt happiness rise in him, but he forced it down. Jude had assured him close to this before. It wasn't any different. Connor faced Jude fully._

 _"You know what, I don't... think I can keep doing this," Connor admitted, holding his breath, knowing what he would have to do. He avoided Jude's eyes._

 _"I know." Connor looked up, his eyebrows furrowed. What? "And you won't have to. I promise," Connor was confused. Where was this coming from? He searched Jude's eyes for answers. "Because I am super gay. For you," Jude emphasized 'you'. Connor felt his resolve break. A grin broke out on his face. He laughed, his eyes dropping to the ground, his cheeks turning a light pink. He couldn't help the happiness that came over him as he looked at Jude who had started smiling as well. He realized a slow song was playing._

 _"You wanna dance?" Connor offered, tilting his head and moving closer to Jude. Jude looked at him with a smile and clear fondness in his eyes._

 _"I'd love to," he spoke with complete confidence. Connor didn't know what happened, but he was glad it did, because he had Jude now. And he never had to worry about doubting Jude's feelings for him again. Connor smiled, reaching forward and grabbing Jude's hand and leading the boy who was willing onto the dance floor. They weaved their way through the couples dancing together and found a spot in the center. Connor stopped, allowing Jude to walk around in front of him. Connor let Jude's hand fall from his, lifting the hand onto Jude's shoulder and his opposite onto Jude's waist. Jude placed the hand Connor had been holding on Connor's waist and his other on Connor's shoulder._

 _The goofy grins don't leave their faces as they adjusted and got comfortable in their position, looking each other up and down and giggling when they met eyes. Connor kept his eyes on the ground, trying to keep his feet from stepping over Jude's. When he looked back up, he saw Jude staring at him and smiling wider than Connor has ever seen. His own smile grew when he caught Jude. They swayed gently, keeping time with the slow music. It's a moment before Connor realizes that Cole and Callie had started dancing beside them. But, his attention is more on Jude._

 _How Jude's hands feel on his waist and shoulder, and how Jude's feel under his hands. Jude's waist his slime, but Connor's hand seems to fit perfectly on it. Connor thought he'd never been happier than in that moment. Butterflies were fluttering in his stomach, and his heart was beating steadily. He just wanted to hold Jude. So, he started inching slowly closer. He moved his hand around to the small of Jude's back, feeling Jude adjust his hand on Connor's shoulder. He presses his hand against Jude, hoping Jude understood Connor wanted him closer. He eyes the ground as he moves himself closer. Then lifts them, seeing Jude look at Callie. He smiles at Jude when he breaks the contact with his sister, then pulls Jude against him, feeling Jude relax completely against him, resting his head gently on Connor's shoulder._

 _Jude's arm wrapped all the way around Connor and his other bends as he is pressed against Connor. Connor tightened his grip on Jude's shoulder and presses his hand against Jude, bringing it up and down his boyfriend's back in a calm motion and rested his head against Jude's neck, closing his eyes lightly as they swayed. All the anger, sadness, fear, and annoyance was completely gone from him, feeling Jude's body against him, relaxed and content. Connor's sure Jude feels as happy as he is in this moment._

[][][][][][][]

Connor squeezed his eyes shut tightly, feeling tears fall through his eyelashes and onto his cheeks. He missed the closeness he had with Jude that night. He knew in his heart that was the night he had fallen in love with Jude, even though it had only come to his realization the day they'd been caught. He breathed a sigh and shook his head, steadying his breathing and allowed himself to fall asleep to the thought of holding Jude close, their breaths and heartbeats in time to the music and to each other.

* * *

 **Oh god, that gave me a cavity to write that last line. BTW, Jesus and Connor's flashbacks will have extended versions posted in Family Bonding and Hold Onto Me. I have a surprise for y'all next week!**

 **Follow me on Tumblr at jonnorlandfill.**

 **I don't own The Fosters or anything your recognize.**

 **-HJ**


	8. Day 7: Relapse

_**Day 7: Relapse**_

"Is he suppose to be this cold?" Jesus asked, his fingers brushing Jude's arm. He stood off to the side of Jude's bed. He glanced over at Connor, who sat in the chair on the other side of the bed, his hand on top of Jude's.

"I don't know. I think it's because he hasn't moved in a week or something," Connor shrugged. He didn't pay attention to the temperature of Jude's body when he was in the room. He just focused on being there, beside Jude, even if he was unconscious. Whenever he was in the room it felt almost like he was closer to Jude, if that made sense.

"I guess," Jesus shrugged. He looked down at his brother, frowning and sighing softly. "You better wake up soon, bro," he whispered, almost inaudible. Connor looked up at Jesus, then dropped his gaze when he saw a tear come down the older boy's face. He knew Jesus wasn't one to show his sadness, so he wasn't going to push. He heard some sniffles and Jesus shuffle. He looked up as Jesus spoke. "I'm gonna go back out. Callie'll probably be back in a few minutes," he mumbled, turning around and exiting the room without further action.

Connor sighed, resting his chin on the bed, squeezing Jude's hand. "He's right, you know," Connor spoke out loud. "You need to wake up," he told Jude, his eyebrows raised as if he expected a response from the unconscious boy. "We're not doing so good without you," he began, sitting up, only to move his arm under his chin. "Callie hasn't talked much sense it happened. Stef and Lena have been trying to hold it together for all of us, but I know they're doing just as bad," he added. He was hoping that somehow, someway Jude could hear him. He had heard of people being able to hear you when in a coma. He hoped Jude could. He was about to start talking. Maybe tell Jude about how Brandon had written a song about him. Maybe tell him how all he had thought about yesterday were his favorite moments with the Jude.

But, then Callie came in the door and he kept his mouth shut. He watched as the girl came in, a coffee cup that he knew had barely a sip taken out of it held in her hand. The edges of her eyes were puffy and pink, with dark bags underneath. Her eyes were dull and lifeless and she had a frown fixed on her face. She walked over to the bed and forced a small smile on her face.

"Hey," she muttered, avoiding Connor's eyes. Connor sat up, squeezing Jude's hand once more before standing up and moving out of the way.

"You can sit," he whispered, keeping his eyes on Jude's peaceful face.

"Uh, no. Actually, I came to get you. We have to go back in the waiting room. The doctor's coming to check on him, and they're planning to move him out of the ICU," Callie explained, the smile on her face seeming more genuine at the prospect of Jude getting better. Connor's eyebrows raised and his eyes widened, a small smile appearing on his face.

"Really? That's good right?" he asked. She nodded, allowing a small laugh to escape her lips.

"Yeah, it should be," she moved forward, placing her free hand on his shoulder. "Come on," she spoke, pulling on his shoulder gently. She led him out of the room and back into the comfortable waiting room.

"Hey, love," Stef greeted, smiling at the two. Connor returned it, moving to sit down beside the woman. Callie moved over and sat beside Mariana, taking a sip from the coffee cup she had. Stef placed her arm around Connor's shoulder, kissing the side of his head.

"How long is it gonna be before we can go in and see him again?" Connor asked, looking up at Stef hopefully. She rubbed his shoulder, looking at him.

"Um, about an hour, hon. They have to make sure he can be moved, and moving him takes time, especially since he has to stay hooked up to the machines," she explained. Connor nodded, then leaned his head against her shoulder, allowing his thoughts to drift. He felt Stef lean her head on his and breathed a sigh as he felt his eyes grow heavy. In the past week Connor had hardly gotten any sleep, but he felt himself drifting as he leaned against Stef. And then, he was sleeping, his only thoughts of Jude.

[][][][][][][]

 _"And, hey! LA isn't that far right?" Jude asked. Connor smiled, watching Jude. "I mean... there are trains," he suggested. Then the frowned returned to his face as he looked back at Connor. Jude stepped closer, leaning into him and Connor did the same, his arms enveloping all the way around Jude's torso, burying his head into Jude's shoulder, his eyelids closed tightly. He felt one of Jude's arms around his neck, and the other around his shoulder, squeezing him close. But, Connor wasn't complaining. He squeezed back just as forcefully, moving forward as the two swayed onto their feet to stand straight in their embrace._

 _In that moment, nothing else existed. All that mattered was that they were Jude and Connor and they had said they love each other and that they needed to hold each other for as long as possible before the cruel, cold hands of fate ripped them apart. They both knew they could choose to stay together. But, fate was cruel. It decided to give Connor divorced parents and have his mother move to LA. It chose to have him live with a father who couldn't accept him. It chose to have a mother who could, but lived two hours away from his boyfriend whom he loved. It chose to make Jude understanding, and Callie have the right words to say that swayed Jude to give Connor his blessing and his heart._

 _Connor breathed in everything that was Jude, lifting his head and moving his chin on Jude's shoulder, moving so his neck was pressed flush against Jude's shoulder. He leaned his mouth close to Jude's ear, his eyes still closed. "I love you," he whispered, clear and quiet, only for Jude's ears. The response was instant. Jude tightened his grip on Connor, taking a shaking breath._

 _"I love you, too," Jude whispered. Even if they had said it moments ago, the words hadn't lost their effect and hearing them and saying them felt like a weight off Connor's shoulders. In his head there had been a fear. Not knowing if Jude felt the same made him much more hesitant to move in with his mother. But, now that he knew, he knew he could go anywhere and Jude would still be there, supporting and loving as always. Connor pulled his head back, opening his eyes. He felt Jude lift his own head from Connor's shoulder. They leaned their foreheads together, staring at each other._

 _Jude leaned forward and pressed his lips softly against Connor's. Connor returned the kiss, then pulled back a moment later. He licked his lips and sighed. "Maybe we should head back," he whispered, meeting Jude's eyes that were shifting around Connor's face. Jude nodded._

 _"Alright," He moved his arms slowly off Connor's shoulders, Connor doing the same to Jude's torso. Connor's grasped Jude's hand, keeping him close. Jude smiled softly. "Come on," he whispered, tugging Connor's hand. Connor nodded, following Jude, their arms pressed together as they walked toward where the family had gathered._

 _"Hey, boys!" Stef greeted, a grin on her face. Callie was looking at them, biting her lip, a concerned look on her face and Connor had no doubt that she had seen their hug._

 _"Hey," Jude greeted, smiling, seeming not to notice Callie. Connor smiled as well, glancing around at them. What was he going to tell them? The Adams Fosters were his family, he would miss them almost as much as he missed Jude if he went to LA. He shook his head, pushing the thought away. He would worry about that later. Right now, what was important was that Callie had been adopted, and that Jude loved him as much as he loved Jude._

[][][][][][][]

Connor's eyes fluttered open, and he blinked, lifting his head hesitantly from Stef's shoulder.

"Hey, love. Have a nice nap?" she asked,.

"Uh, yeah," he spoke sitting up.

"You know you talk in your sleep," Stef informed, smiling.

"I-I do?" he asked, a blush rising on his cheeks. Stef laughed, shaking her head.

"Yeah. Don't worry. I do, too," she explained.

"Um, wh-what did you hear?" he questioned, shifting his eyes to the armrest.

"Mostly it was just mumbling, but I did hear you say Jude's name," she admitted softly. His cheeks darkened, and he fidgeted with his fingers. "What were you dreaming about?" she asked.

"Did he tell you about the day of Callie's adoption?" he mumbled, rubbing the back of his neck. Stef nodded.

"Yeah. But, it was only just before the accident," she told him. Connor nodded, taking a breath.

"That was it," he explained. He glanced around at everyone. They were all focused on something else, except for Lena who sat beside Stef, listening quietly.

Stef smiled, nodding and glancing over at her wife.

"You know, I remember the first time Lena and I told each other 'I-love-you'," she began, smiling. Connor tilted his head, the blush finally leaving his cheeks.

"Yeah? When?" Connor asked. He had to admit he was curious. He always admired Stef and Lena, not only as mothers, but as a couple. They were what he hoped him and Jude could be like someday.

"Well-"

"Stef wouldn't admit it," Lena butted in, a smirk on her face.

"Hey! That's not true," Stef frowned, shaking her head at Lena. Connor tilted his head.

"Huh?" he asked, looking between the two.

"See, before I met Lena, I was married to Mike. I thought I was straight. She helped me realize I wasn't, but it was still hard to accept, with my father having been homophobic and all," Stef explained.

"Oh..." Connor muttered, blinking at them. That sounded almost identical to how him and Jude had ended up together.

"Yeah, and-"

"Mrs. Adams Foster, Mrs. Adams Foster?" a nurse asked, coming through the door. The women stood and Connor followed. The Adams Foster siblings followed, standing back while their mothers moved forward.

"Yes, what is it?" Lena asked. Stef held her wife's arm, worry written on her face. Connor felt his heart sink as he watched the nurse's face. She was frowning and avoiding the mothers' eyes.

"Your son, Jude. He has been doing great. But, while we were preparing him for moving, we found that his internal bleeding had started again. He needs to go back into surgery. The bleeding having started again is not a good sign, however."

He tuned out everything else the nurse was saying. Connor stepped back, feeling his knees go weak. He was vaguely aware of Jesus and Brandon grabbing his arms to keep him steady. Jude was getting worse.

* * *

 **OH THE SUSPENSE! We have officially reached the half-way point in this fic! And in honor of that, sometime between now and two weeks from now, I will be posting a side-story! I am honestly so excited for you guys to read it. It will not be posted in this fic, so you'll have to look out for it. I want to hear your guesses on what you think it will be about! I started dropping hints about it in Chapter 6 ;). Alright! I'm so excited, look out for the side-story, which will be titled 'The Fighting Soul and The Broken Body'.**

 **Follow me on Tumblr at jonnorlandfill.**

 **I do not of The Fosters or anything your recognize.**

 **-HJ**


	9. Day 8: Mildly Okay

**_Day 8: Mildly Okay_**

Connor stared at the green wall of the living room, his legs drawn to his chest, his expression emotionless. "Connor, come on, you've got to eat something," Callie told him, sitting beside him on the couch. Him and Callie were in the living room, Brandon, Mariana, and Jesus were in their rooms, and Stef and Lena were in the kitchen. It was late at night. After yesterday, Stef and Lena had forced the kids to come home after they found out Jude would be okay. But, Connor wasn't having it. He had practically completely shut down. What if it happened again? What if he didn't wake up? What if? What if? What if?

"I told you I'm not hungry," Connor's voice was weak and croaky from lack of use in the past twenty-four hours. He turned his hazel eyes on Callie who sighed and shook her head.

"Connor, he's gonna be okay," Callie told him, though her voice wasn't certain. Connor gave a cold laugh.

"Like you know that for sure?" he glared at her. She shook her head, pinching the bridge of her nose.

"Fine, whatever," she told him, placing the plate of Chinese food down and standing up, walking around him and into the kitchen. Connor sighed, closing his eyes tightly and hugging his legs tighter, resting his forehead on his knees. He felt a body beside him and a hand on his back. He groaned, lifting his eyes, ready to tell Callie off, when he saw it was Lena. He closed his mouth, turning his eyes away from her.

"Hey, bud, can we talk?" she asked. Her voice was soft and soothing, warm and inviting. He closed his eyes tightly. She reminded him so much of Jude. He nodded his head in spite of himself and took a shaky breath.

"Yeah," he breathed out. Lena began moving her hand up and down his back in a calming motion, much like he'd done to Jude the night of the LGBT prom.

"Listen. I know you're worried, and scared. We all are. But, you can't shut yourself down. You can't just ignore the people who care about you and refuse to take care of yourself. I'll be honest, I don't know if Jude is going to be okay. I don't know if he will make it through this," Connor let a sob erupt from his throat and he buried his head in his knees as he listened to her continue, her voice softening, somehow, even further. "But, what I do know it this. No matter what happens, he wouldn't want you tearing yourself apart. He wouldn't want you to shut yourself down. Would you want that for him if it were you?" Connor couldn't speak, so he just shook his head. "Exactly. So, you need to talk. You need to eat. You need to go on," she told him, moving her arm up his back and squeezing his shoulder.

Connor released another sob, shaking his head. "I can't... I can't," Connor started, lifting his head gingerly and trying to wipe away his tears. Lena kept her hand on his shoulder, waiting for him to continue. He took a breath, composing himself only a small amount. "He's the reason I was able to figure out who I am. He's the reason I had the courage to stand up to my dad. He's the one who kept pushing me to move to LA whenever I got scared to leave. I don't know what to do without him..." he spoke through his tears.

"Well, you don't have to think about that yet. He's still alive, he's still breathing. We both know he's working his hardest. I think he'll make it through. But, we have to stay strong for him, okay? Okay?" Connor turned his head toward her, nodding his head and taking shaky breaths. "Okay," she whispered, pulling him into her. Connor wrapped his arms around her waist, resting his head on his shoulder and sobbing into it. This lasted a few moments, before Connor composed himself and pulled back, wiping his eyes.

"I'm sorry," he whispered.

"It's okay, sweetie. I'm going to head go clean up, you okay to head up to bed in a few minutes?" Lena asked him. Connor nodded, standing up with her. Lena went toward the kitchen, while Connor walked up the stairs, turning toward the bathroom and pushing open the door. He gasped as he saw Mariana standing in front of one of the mirrors, crying.

"Sorry," Connor told her, moving to leave.

"No, it's okay, I'm done," she told him, turning toward him. Connor nodded, and the two exchanged a quick hug and goodnight and then Mariana headed toward her bedroom. Connor got ready, then slipped in Jude and Jesus' room. Jesus was already sound asleep in his bed. Connor closed the bathroom door, then slid under Jude's covers, taking a breath as he squeezed his eyes shot, thinking of his encounter with Mariana. He remembered Jude telling him about him in on Mariana crying the day of their grandfather's funeral. It made him think about the Ouija board. Where would they be if he hadn't done anything?

[][][][][][][]

 _"You're moving it!" Connor accused Jude, watching the planchette move around the board, his, Jude's, and Mariana's fingers moving with it._

 _"I swear I'm not!" Jude promised, laughing._

 _"Come on, you guys, someone is definitely moving this!" Mariana told us, glancing between us and the board._

 _"This can't be real. We need to ask like a test question, something nobody knows the answer to," Jude suggested as the planchette finally stopped in the center._

 _"Okay, I've got one!" Mariana grinned, a spark lighting her eyes. She closed them, then spoke. "Will I ever have a boyfriend?" she asked. Connor opened one eyes, raising an eyebrow at Jude who was doing the same to him. He restrained a laugh as the planchette slid to 'yes'._

 _"Now who's moving it?" Jude asked with a laugh. Mariana rolled her eyes, but turned back toward the board._

 _"Okay, wait, I've gotta know who," she told them, sliding the planchette back to the center. She closed her eyes again. "What is the name of my first boyfriend?" she asked, then opened her eyes as the planchette slid over to the letter Z._

 _"Who's Z?" Connor asked, eyebrows furrowed, looking back and forth between Jude and his sister. He watched a smirk come onto Jude's face as he looked at Mariana._

 _"Zac," he teased. Mariana's eyes went wide, and she jumped up from the bed._

 _"Okay, you know what? I'm good. This is just a silly board game. You two communicate with the spirit world all you want, I'm done," she rambled, then heading out of her room. Jude and Connor laughed, shaking their head and putting their fingers back on the planchette. They played around, asking random questions and laughing at the answer. Then, they decided to 'let the spirits tell them what they wished', as they put it. The planchette slid to the letter T, then O._

 _"To? What does that mean?" Connor asked, tilting his head. The planchette slid to 'Y'. "_ _Toy?"_

 _"Do you think they're trying to tell us that the Ouija board is just a toy and we shouldn't play with it?" Jude asked, tilting his own head._

 _"No, I don't think so," Connor shook his head, frowning at the board._

 _"Oh my god!" Jude exclaimed suddenly. Connor looked up at his friend's outburst. "Frank just gave us a new TOYota," Jude spoke excitedly, thinking his figured it out._

 _"He got you a new car?" Connor asked, smirking._

 _"Stef is making us give it away," Jude explained._

 _"Why?" Connor questioned. Jude shrugged, then looked at the board with furrowed eyebrows._

 _"Maybe he wants us to keep it?" Jude spoke hesitantly, looking at the board. Connor lifted his hands from the planchette._

 _"You didn't push it?" Connor asked, not trusting the board anymore. Jude just shook his head. Connor nodded, believing him. He might not trust the board, but he trusted Jude._

 _"Can we do one more?" Jude asked._

 _"Yeah, sure," Connor answered with a smile, putting his fingers back on the planchette. Jude did the same. Connor focused his eyes on the board, but watched in the corner of his eye as Jude looked toward the ceiling and spoke._

 _"Mom?" Jude started. Connor's eyes lifted, a frown forming on his face. He knew that Jude's mom had died, that was also the reason that his father was in jail. Why was he trying to talk to her though? "Are you there?" Jude asked. The planchette moved to 'yes'. The boys both smiled, Connor smiling mostly due to Jude's happiness. They moved the planchette back to the middle, then Jude lifted his head again. "Mom. Is it okay if Stef and Lena adopt me?" Connor's breath caught in his throat. So, that's why. Jude wanted his mother's permission to stay with another family. For a moment the planchette didn't move, and it didn't seem like it was going to. Connor was angry. So she could answer if she was there, but she couldn't let her son know he could be adopted? Connor wanted Jude to stay. He had easily become Connor's best friend, and Connor certainly wasn't going to loose him now. As gently as possible, he pushed the planchette toward 'yes'._

 _The smile that lite up Jude's face was worth it. Jude lifted his head, and turned the smile to Connor, who returned it happily. Jude was here to stay._

[][][][][][][]

Connor released a sigh. If he hadn't moved the planchette, Jude probably would have decided he didn't want to be adopted, and none of this would have happened. Soon after they had started dating, Connor had of course told Jude the truth. Jude had laughed and told him he was glad. Connor closed his eyes and let himself drift to sleep, thinking of the Ouija board and Jude.

* * *

 **I know, I know, short as hell, and the next chapter will be short as well, but then drama will start to unfold my friends, just be patient.**

 **Follow me on Tumblr at jonnorlandfill.**

 **I do not own The Fosters or anything you recognize.**

 **-HJ**


	10. Day 9: The Love of a Sister

**_Day 9: The Love of a Sister_**

 _Callie nearly jumped out of her skin as Jude plopped down beside her._

 _"Jude! Little warning next time, thanks," she rolled her eyes, shaking her head, then throwing down her pencil. She had been jotting down ideas for her Fost & Found app. Mariana would help her write the coding later. Her youngest brother laughed._

 _"Sorry. Whatcha doing?" Jude questioned._

 _"Attempting to think of ideas for Fost & Found. Do you have any idea how hard it is to find kids who will willingly call out people?" she sighed, running a hand through her hair and leaning forward over the coffee table._

 _"Well, is it that surprising? Before you made your video, no one wanted to. At least now a few people have the courage," Jude told her, smiling._

 _"Yeah, I know, and you have no idea how amazing it is that I inspired them to do that, but we need more of them. There are so many unfit foster parents, and judges who won't sign for adoptions, and social workers who aren't doing their jobs-"_

 _"Callie, you need to calm down," Jude told her, his hand on her shoulder. "I'm sure plenty more people will want to share there stories, their just scared because they're not secure. You put up our story, why not have Jesus and Mariana do their's?" Jude suggested. Callie lifted her head, her eyes narrowed._

 _"Why didn't I think of that?" she mumbled. "Thanks, Jude," she moved her arm around him and squeezed him close._

 _"Anytime, Cal," he laughed, hugging her back. After the moment the two pulled away, then Callie went barreling up the stairs. "Jesus! Mariana! I have a proposition for you!"_

[][][][][][][]

Here's the thing about having someone you love be in a coma. You're always waiting. Because you have no idea what is going to happen, so your mind is never at peace. It was driving Callie crazy. She had always been able to protect Jude, she had always been able to make him feel better and make him happy and keep him safe. Sure, that had changed when they came to the Fosters. He had more people to make him happy and feel safe, but Callie still held a protectiveness over him. Sure, some of the things she does in that fact might seem irrational, but it's all in good heart. But she couldn't do that now. Jude was in a coma, she couldn't do anything to wake him up, she couldn't keep him from slipping through her fingers.

She sighed and lifted her right leg onto the chair and pulled it close to her, resting her chin on her knee. She glanced over at Connor, who was sitting a few rows down, sketching in a notebook she'd given him before they'd left the house. Over the past few days she had tried to distract herself from her thoughts by transferring her protectiveness onto Connor. She'd been successful enough, until yesterday when he refused to eat or do anything but sit and stare at the wall. She didn't blame him though, Jude's internal bleeding scare had affected them all. But, she had a mini freak out when she couldn't do anything to help him. But, luckily Lena had, and he was back to functioning as close to normal as possible. She stood up and moved to sit beside him.

"What are you drawing?" Callie asked, leaning close to him. Connor jumped and then angled his notebook away from her.

"Nothing," he mumbled, a pink color dusting his cheeks. She frowned, but then nodded.

"Okay," she told him. Maybe this would help. She pulled out her phone, unlocked it, then opened her gallery and turned to the picture she'd been editing for eight days, trying to perfect it. She angled it toward Connor. Connor turned his eyes toward it when he saw what she was doing.

"Woah," he muttered as he stared at the picture. It was a picture of Jude, a few days after Callie's adoption. Connor was in it, but Jude was obviously the main focus of the photo. Jude's cheeks were a soft pink color, and a laugh was on his lips, a sparkle in his eyes. Connor's lips were on Jude's left cheek, his hand on the opposite one. Connor's face was mostly hidden behind the blur and filtering Callie had put on the photo, but you could still see the smile spread across his face and the content expression he held as he kissed his boyfriend's cheek. Jude's hands were gripping Connor's forearm that had come in front of his face to cup his other cheek. The picture was blurred and shadowed around the edges, and covered with a color filter was over it, valencia maybe? Most of the photo was black and white, but the blue and red of the photo was highlighted. The pink of both their lips and cheeks, the red of Jude's shirt and the blue of Connor's, the blue from the coffee mug laying at the edge of the photo, red from the sunlight shining through the window. "Callie, this is amazing..." Connor commented.

Callie smiled. "You think so? It's been keeping my mind off the whole thing. It's my favorite picture of him," Callie explained. Connor nodded.

"Mine too. Can you send it to me?" he asked.

"When I'm done with it," she laughed. She locked her phone, then shoved it in her pocket. "Can I see your drawing?" she asked, pointing to the notebook he'd turned over in his lap. Connor hesitated before nodded and removing his hands from protectively covering the notebook. Callie gingerly lifted it from his lap, looking over to see Connor with his eyes on his hands, fidgeting with his thumbs. Callie turned the drawing over and gasped at the sight of the drawings. On the paper was a very realistic drawing of Jude. It looked like a picture. The picture was simple, a front view of Jude from the chest up. It was much like her picture, but without color, filter, or blur. "Connor... I had no idea you were such a good artist," she whispered, staring the picture and tracing her fingers down the drawing. Connor shrugged.

"Jude was really the only one who knew," he explained. "But I could never do him justice," he explained, motioning toward the picture. Callie shook her head and smiled at him.

"It's beautiful," she handed the drawing back to him and he smiled.

"Thanks," he whispered, then lifted the pencil and became to add a shadow behind Jude's figure. Callie smiled, watching him for a moment before deciding to work on her own masterpiece.

* * *

 **It physically hurts me how short this is, but I promise you next week's will be full of drama and oh, I can't wait for y'all you find out. Also, I kinda took the Connor drawing thing from a plethora of other writers. I have seen so many people who have made fics with Connor being an amazing artist, which I really loved the idea from, so I used it.**

 **Follow me on Tumblr at jonnorlandfill.**

 **I do not own The Fosters or anything you recognize.**

 **-HJ**


	11. Day 10: So Much for Secrets

_**Day 10: So Much for Secrets**_

Connor bit his thumb as his dad dropped him off in front of Anchor Beach. Stef and Lena had forced the Adams Foster kids to go to school, and they along with Adam had forced Connor into it. He wasn't excited. He felt like a part of him was still at the hospital with Jude. Connor dropped his hand from his mouth and tugged on his backpack strap and walked down the pathway. He hadn't expected to end up back at Anchor Beach. The last time he had been here, he had planned to be going to LA. But, that was also the day of Jude's accident, and now it was Monday and he had missed a week and he had no idea how he was going to get through the day.

"Connor Stevens!" Connor froze as he heard Taylor's voice as he made it to the outdoor lunch tables. He turned slowly and saw the girl charging toward him, a determined look on her face. He had no idea what she was planning, so he opened his mouth to defend himself. What he wasn't expecting was for her to pause as she stopped inches in front of him, then throw her arms around his shoulders and hug him. Connor hesitated as she spoke. "I'm so sorry," Connor sighed, hugging her back. They pulled away after a moment.

"Don't be," he told her. "He's gonna be fine," Connor told her, gripping his backpack strap. Taylor looked at him, doubt clear on her face.

"Okay. What about LA?" Taylor asked, crossing her arms over her chest. Connor smiled softly at her. As much as Taylor was sarcastic and meddling at times, she really cared about her friends.

"I'm not going," he answered simply.

"Connor, Jude wants you to go," Taylor informed him.

"That's not true," Connor answered with a forced laugh. "He didn't _want_ me to go. He wants me to be happy and safe, and yeah, that may be with my mom in LA, but there's no way I can be anywhere near happy while Jude is in that hospital bed," Connor explained to her, his gaze falling to the rocks on the ground. Taylor looked at him, her head tilted, a small look of worry on her face.

"You really love him, huh?" she asked.

Connor kept his eyes on the ground before lifting them and nodding. "Yeah, I do," he told her, not a hint of embarrassment on his face. Taylor smiled sadly at him, then lifted her hand to his shoulder.

"Come on, let's get to class," she told him. Connor nodded, and the two made their way inside the school.

[][][][][][][]

Connor somehow managed to get through the first half of the day. Connor was asked only a couple times of why he was there, and where Jude was, but he knew that rumors were circling. He was relieved when lunch finally rolled around.

He placed his tray down at his usual table, sitting in the spot facing the tree. He wasn't hungry. All day his thoughts had been whirling, and whenever a teacher's phone rang or another teacher came in, he half expected it to be for someone calling him down to the office because something had happened to Jude.

Connor jumped as two trays slammed down across from him. He raised his gaze and saw Daria and Taylor sitting down. "Hey, Connor," Daria greeted, smiling stiffly at Connor. Connor placed down the sandwich he had been pretending to eat and turned his eyes to Taylor.

"You told her?" he asked with a raised eyebrow. Taylor bit her lip.

"Yeah, sorry," she answered. Connor shrugged.

"I probably would have told her anyway," Connor answered. Since school had started again, Connor and Jude had learned to become friends with Daria, and she had long since forgiven Connor for everything that went down. Daria looked at him with a worried look.

"Is he gonna be okay?" she asked. Connor ran his finger around the rim of his soda can and shrugged.

"We don't know," he answered honestly, closing his eyes briefly. Daria's eyes widened.

"You don't? What d-" Daria ceased her words as Aiden, the boy who had confronted Jude and Connor at the beach at the beginning of the summer, threw himself into the seat beside Connor and leaned close to the boy.

"So is it true?" he asked, his eyes wide, as he questioned Connor. Connor pinched the bridge of his nose, then looked at Aiden.

"Is what true?" Connor questioned back. He didn't even want to know what people were coming up with.

"That you and Jude broke up and that's why you're not moving to LA and why Jude hasn't been in school," Aiden answered, a hopeful grin on his face, hungry for the latest gossip. Connor glared at the boy.

"Right, because that makes total sense," he answered, his tone laced with sarcasm. "Why wouldn't I be moving to LA if we had broken up? I was going because my dad couldn't accept me being gay, that wouldn't change if Jude was out of the picture," Connor exclaimed, his eyes flaring with anger. His temper had been short with Aiden ever since he had confronted the two at the beginning of summer. Taylor and Daria exchanged a look as they watched the interaction. Aiden moved back, his face falling.

"Oh, I guess you're right..." Aiden spoke, seeming to process the information. Then he leaned forward again. "Then why aren't you moving? And where's Jude?" Aiden asked.

"Is that your business?" Daria cut in, her eyes narrowed in a glare. Aiden turned toward the girl, his eyes wide. Taylor and Connor gave her the same look.

"Um..." Aiden spoke, as if he was thinking about it. "No," he answered finally.

"Then back off!" Daria told him, her voice final. Aiden's eyes widened further, and he nodded, getting off the bench and moving back to his table. Connor turned his attention to the girl.

"Thanks, Daria," Connor thanked the girl, biting his lip. Daria shrugged.

"He's an ass," she explained.

"Didn't know you had that in you, Dar," Taylor commented, raising her eyebrows at her friend.

"Like I said, he's an ass. And I wasn't going to let him push you, especially when you're having such a hard time," Daria explained, focusing her eyes on Connor.

Connor smiled softly at her. "Thanks," he repeated. The three continued to eat lunch, chatter floating around the table. When the bell rang, they went their separate ways, and somehow, Connor made it through the rest of the day.

* * *

 **I can't believe this, but we have four more chapters till the end! I hope you guys liked this chapter.**

 **Follow me on Tumblr at jonnorlandfill.**

 **I do not own The Fosters or anything you recognize.**

 **-HJ**


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